Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is undeniable that people are doing more shopping nowadays. In the current years, many local stores business collapsed due to the buyers tend to buy items from malls rather than small shops. in my views it is completely downward development because it affects many family business and local inhabitants.

Nowadays due to fashionble trend shoppers moved to the big malls for their shopping. Although it is convenient as they might find all brands and items at same place; However, quality can be compromised in the big stores. Furthermore cost may vary since malls have to cover their maintainance cost. Mostly bigger stores are located in to the urban area which increase transporation fees and traffice congestions. Therefore customers should preferred to buy from local stores rahter than malls. To quote an instance, under poverty consumers can not afford high rated items.

Additionally, many residents lost their jobs due to decrement in the small business. To elaborate, many family businesses running on locals support but due to negative trend not only shopkeepers but also workers are in difficult situations. Many families are relaying on thier local business however, due to this trend many workers lost their family business.

To conclude, because of customers moved from local to big shops, not only shopkeepers but also locals facing challenges. It is completely negative trend since it is affecting many inhabitants.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The candidate addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the closure of local shops is a negative development, supporting it with ideas regarding family businesses and local inhabitants. However, the response falls short of the minimum word requirement, containing only 228 words instead of the required 250 words. This under-length impacts the overall development of ideas, leading to some generalisations and repetition, particularly in the third and final paragraphs where points about job losses and family businesses are reiterated without significant extension. As a result of not meeting the task length constraint and the resulting under-development of ideas, the response aligns best with a Band 5.0 for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The text is organized into four distinct paragraphs with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, showing some basic organizational structure. However, the overall progression is somewhat hindered by repetitive points and awkward transitions. Cohesive devices are used, but sometimes inaccurately or mechanically, such as starting a sentence with 'Although it is convenient...; However, quality can be compromised' or using 'To elaborate' followed by repetitive ideas. Referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen with pronouns and transitional phrases. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion and logical flow require tighter control. This places the response comfortably within the Band 5.0 descriptors for Coherence and Cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, though it is limited and repetitive in places. The candidate attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'transportation fees', 'traffic congestions', and 'downward development', but these attempts are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'fashionble trend' and 'high rated items'. There are also several spelling and morphological errors, including 'maintainance', 'relaying', and 'decrement'. While communication is mostly maintained, the frequent lexical errors and limited range restrict the score to a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures are frequently marred by grammatical errors. Examples include 'many local stores business collapsed due to the buyers tend to buy items' and 'because of customers moved from local to big shops, not only shopkeepers but also locals facing challenges', which lack necessary auxiliary verbs and proper subordination. Punctuation and capitalization errors are also present, such as starting sentences with lowercase letters ('in my views'). Frequent errors in grammar cause some difficulty for the reader, aligning the performance with Band 5.0.

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