Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-24
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.
Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In the past few years we see that a lot of tiny have closed because people prefer to go in shopping malls and centre for buying things. On the result, are owners of small shops lost their jobs and become poor.
According to me, this is both positive and negative development depending on the situation. Like opening large malls and centre increases theb employement. For example, one of my friend did BCom. and after the college he finds a job as an accountant in a shopping mall. I found that if a person really have talent or skill they can easily finds job. Also, we get a large amount of varities in these kind of shopping malls and in the malls we find everything. That's why malls are very convenient for us.
On the other hand, the small shop owners lose their work. On of my relative had there own grocery shop before two years. But after malls and centre built. They close there shop and now he go in a factory for earning. And also we get fresh and handmade things from these kinds of shops but from the mall we usually get the packed items. That's the negative side of this kind of development.
In conclusion, I just wants to say that if a person have skill then the malls and shopping centres never replace them.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both positive and negative aspects of the shift from local shops to shopping malls, presenting a clear personal position. However, the ideas are somewhat under-developed and lack extended explanation. For instance, the mention of job creation and the loss of traditional stores is supported by brief personal anecdotes rather than broader arguments. Crucially, the length requirement of 250 words is not met, as the response contains only 228 words. This shortcoming directly impacts the full development of ideas required for higher bands, placing the response firmly at Band 5.0 for this criterion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into an introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion, showing some basic paragraphing structure. However, the logical progression is weak, and transitions between sentences can feel abrupt. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical or repetitive manner, such as starting multiple sentences with phrases like 'On the result' and 'On the other hand'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as pronoun shifts between singular and plural references. While the text is generally understandable, the overall organizational flow lacks the clear progression required for Band 6.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with frequent reliance on simple words like 'things', 'shops', and 'malls'. There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'tiny' instead of 'tiny shops', 'increases theb employement', and 'get a large amount of varities'. Spelling and word-choice errors, including 'varities' and 'on of my relative', occasionally cause minor strain for the reader. The range of vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey basic ideas, aligning with the descriptors for Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the essay, including tense inconsistencies ('we see that', 'are owners... lost'), subject-verb agreement issues ('if a person really have talent... they can easily finds job'), and preposition errors ('go in shopping malls'). These frequent errors can cause difficulty for the reader and prevent the text from achieving a Band 6.0, as error-free sentences are not in the majority.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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