Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, small scale shops have been closing because people are more likely to visit shopping malls for their shopping. This has brought both positive and negative development in many sectors, however, in my viewpoint, it has affected in a positive way. In this essay I will explain how it has impacted society in a good manner and describe reasons for it.

Firstly, mindset of new generation has been changed vastly. They are more tend to go for purchases in big shopping centres and buy items bulkly rather than visiting each shops to buy different things. Thus they are saving lot of money and they could manage their expenses. For example, ten years back my parents should have to go to vegetable store for buying things and grocery shops for other items such as pulses etc. However, now they can directly go to a super market and purchase all these essential items for kitchen together. Therefore, they are saving money, additionally, it helps to budget the things that are necessary for one whole month.

Secondly, shopping from malls are more enjoyable than going to local shops. Usually these city centres are located in urban ares and families are interested in visiting such shops because of the leisure facilities they have provided. Children and youngsters can participate in various entertainment activities such as cinema, playing games in fun city etc. For example, once a family went for shopping they can take their children to entertainment areas, meanwhile, parents can engage in their purchases.

In conclusion, large shopping centres are increasing recently for a beneficial purpose, that people can managing expenses as well as its providing significant fun activities together with shopping.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the closure of small shops and the shift towards shopping malls, while clearly stating a position that this is a positive development. Ideas are relevant, such as financial savings and leisure facilities, but some are under-developed or lack full extension. For instance, the point about the younger generation changing their mindset is introduced but not fully supported with deeper analysis. To reach a higher level, the writer would need to fully develop all main ideas with more extended explanations and richer examples throughout the body paragraphs, avoiding slight over-generalisations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and body paragraphs are marked by transition signals like 'Firstly' and 'Secondly'. However, cohesion is at times mechanical or faulty, and referencing is not always clear, as seen in the phrase 'once a family went for shopping'. Paragraphing is used, but the logical progression between sentences can feel abrupt. To advance, the writer should ensure that cohesive devices are used more flexibly and naturally, and that referencing pronouns point unambiguously to their intended antecedents to create a smoother, more seamless flow of ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, successfully communicating the main points with a mix of everyday and some less common terms like 'leisure facilities' and 'essential items'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'small scale shops', 'buy items bulkly', and 'urban ares'. There are also minor stylistic issues and word form errors, such as 'people can managing expenses'. To improve, the writer needs to incorporate a wider and more precise range of lexical items, paying closer attention to natural collocations, word forms, and spelling accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as relative clauses and conditional-like examples. However, there are several errors in grammar and punctuation that occur throughout the text, including article omissions, preposition usage, and subject-verb agreement issues, such as 'the mindset... has been changed' and 'each shops'. While these errors rarely impede overall communication, they do persist across the essay. Achieving a higher band requires a broader variety of error-free complex sentences and stricter control over grammatical patterns, articles, and punctuation.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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