Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent years large shopping malls have taken over smaller businesses. This trend is a negative development because it limits the customer's choice and causes economic instability despite the convenience it offers.

When bigger shopping mall takes over the society, it forces the small shop owners to close down their stores. Many of the small retail stores have this business as their main source of income. Closing down their stores might lead to financial difficulties. Some of their employees might also be rendered jobless. Furthermore, these retail stores contribute to the character of the community. The dissappearance of these shops will eventually lead to lack of social interaction in the community.

Another negative impact of increased number of bigger shopping malls in the society is that it reduces the consumers choice. Most big shopping center are dominated by international and national brands. These small shops makes the business more competitive. In the absence of competition in the market, the bigger stores would not be motivated to stock up their stores with variety of products. For example, in an area where there's no competition, the vendors might not be willing to sell varieties of products, thereby forcing the customers to purchase what is available at the store or mall even though it might be their first choice.

Although there are some advantages of these big stores. They provide convenience. The customer can shop, eat and relax in a place. They provide both shopping and entertainment in one spot.

Overall, I believe the closure of small shops is predominantly a negative development. While shopping centers are convenient, maintaining independent businesses are important for employment, competition and viberant communities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you judge the closure of local shops to be negative while acknowledging the convenience of malls. You address the main parts of the question and support your view with relevant consequences, including lost income and jobs, reduced competition, and weaker community interaction. The example of customers having to buy what a mall stocks helps explain the choice argument. However, some claims are broad—for instance, that larger stores will not stock a variety of products without competition—and the convenience point is only briefly explained. To strengthen the response, develop that counterpoint and qualify or illustrate general claims with a specific example or clearer reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two paragraphs explaining disadvantages, a paragraph acknowledging an advantage, and a concluding position. The progression from effects on shop owners and communities to consumer choice is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “For example,” and “Although” help guide the reader. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some features of stronger progression. However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical, with repeated references to “big” stores and “small” shops, and the final paragraph begins with a dependent “Although” clause that is not completed as a full sentence. Use more varied referencing and connect the concession more smoothly to your main argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “economic instability,” “financial difficulties,” “social interaction,” “competition,” and “convenience.” These choices make the main ideas clear, and phrases such as “rendered jobless” show an attempt to use less common language. However, some wording is imprecise or awkward: “taken over smaller businesses” may suggest direct acquisition rather than competition, and “stock up their stores with variety of products” is not a natural collocation. There are also spelling and word-form slips, including “dissappearance” and “viberant,” alongside repeated use of “bigger.” Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling and forms carefully; this would make the vocabulary more flexible and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional construction in “In the absence of competition … the bigger stores would not be motivated” and a concession in the final body paragraph. Meaning remains clear throughout, but some grammatical errors persist. For example, “When bigger shopping mall takes over the society” has article and number problems, while “Most big shopping center are” and “These small shops makes” show subject–verb agreement errors. “The customer can shop, eat and relax in a place” also has an awkward article choice, and “Although there are some advantages of these big stores” is left as a sentence fragment. Review agreement, articles, and complete sentence structure, while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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