Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Yeah in recent years, I also noticed that people prefer to go large shopping centers instead of small shops.

It is due to the large shopping center have all the shopping facilities available under one roof. And the world is progressing day by day and people don't have time to do shopping from small shops. Beacuse now a days most people have mentality to do their shopping from the place that they get everything easily and reliable. In large shopping malls you get variety of everything and they also have big stock of everything.

If we talk about why people don't want to go to small shops because in small shops you don't have variety of different things and also they don't have full stock of everything. But in past when their is no shopping malls in countries people had no choice to go small shops.

The big reason of small shops close is customer.

In country like pakistan Small shop also have great value beacuse in pakistan not everone afford shopping from the mall.So people have to go to the small shops to buy things. But i preferred to go large shopping mall instead of small shops.I am not saying that small shops is not good. They also give same recomendation as shopping mall.For example you guys need small stuff like bread,eggs,toothpaste etc instead of going shopping mall, you can visit the small shops.That things are easily available on that shops.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address the topic and give a personal preference for large malls, while also recognising that small shops remain useful in Pakistan and for everyday items. However, the answer does not clearly decide whether the overall development is positive or negative: the opening focuses on why customers choose malls, but the ending partly defends small shops without resolving the comparison. Reasons such as convenience and wider choice are relevant, yet they are mostly asserted rather than explained with developed examples. The statement “The big reason of small shops close is customer” is too brief to support the argument. The response is also 8 words below the required minimum. State your overall judgement directly, then develop two reasons and support them with specific consequences or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some organisation: the response moves from the appeal of malls to the limitations of small shops, then considers their continuing value. Basic linking phrases such as “But in past” and “For example” help show relationships between ideas. However, progression is not consistently clear, and several points are repeated, particularly the claims that malls offer variety and small shops lack stock. The short sentence “The big reason of small shops close is customer” interrupts the flow and is not connected to a developed explanation. Paragraphing is also absent, making the shift from general discussion to the Pakistan example difficult to follow. Use separate paragraphs for your position, supporting reasons, and qualification, and connect each example explicitly to your judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic topic vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “shopping centres,” “variety,” “stock,” and “afford.” Some wording also shows an attempt to express broader concepts, such as “under one roof.” However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, especially “everything,” “small shops,” and “shopping mall.” There are noticeable spelling and word-choice problems, including “Beacuse,” “recomendation,” and “mentality,” which make parts of the response less natural. Some combinations are also awkward, such as “same recomendation as shopping mall.” Build a wider set of accurate terms for convenience, choice, local businesses, and affordability, and check spelling and collocations during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally understand your main points. For example, you use a reason clause in “because customers travel to large shopping centres” and give an example with “For example.” However, the range remains limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation. “It is due to the large shopping center have…” lacks a grammatical structure after “due to,” while “small shops is not good” has incorrect subject–verb agreement. Several sentences begin with “And” or “But” as fragments, and punctuation is often missing between clauses. Practise building complete sentences with accurate subjects and verbs, and use commas and full stops to separate ideas clearly.

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