Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Shifting tpwars the malls becoming trent vfor everyone nowadays . Whether, some people argued that in recent years , many people small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shoping centres and this can be effect the employement and income of the individuals and all the reason of statement will be discussed in upvcoming paragrapgh.

Firstly, closing of local shops lead to increse the level of unemployment and reduce the income . To explain it , if local shops are starts to close then people who are working there lose their jobs and it reduce the local econmy . For example , a local grocery shops have several local residents. if it shuts down, these workers may stuggle to find another work. as a result, it will not only takes their job but also lose their income.

Secondly, it is true that malls have extreme discounts on the every product but everyone not hsave the right way of transport to reach the mall . for instance . elderly people are more convinent to go to local shops within walking distance because thats totally worthfull for them to without worrying abiut the transport or looking for someone to go with them .

In conclusion, yes goint to malls or large centres give plathora of discounts or variety for the product but importance of local shops can not be neglected beacaue its convient for traveling, give chance for emplyoment for local residents and so on .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You take a generally negative view of local shops closing and give relevant reasons: job losses and the difficulty some older people may have travelling to malls. However, the position is not stated clearly at the outset, and the opening sentence is difficult to understand. The employment point is supported with a brief grocery-shop example, but the transport point is less fully explained, and the conclusion also acknowledges malls’ discounts and variety without clearly weighing these against your concerns. The response is 236 words, so it is 14 words below the 250-word minimum; the 10 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop each reason with a clearer explanation or example, and state your overall judgement directly in the introduction and conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs introduced by “Firstly” and “Secondly,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the two main concerns. Some connections, however, are mechanical or unclear. For example, “all the reason of statement will be discussed” does not clearly preview your argument, while “For example” and “as a result” introduce a relevant sequence in the first body paragraph. The second paragraph shifts to the benefits of malls before explaining the transport disadvantage, which makes its main point less direct. Improve progression by giving each paragraph one clear controlling idea and linking each example explicitly to it; use referencing and transitions that clarify relationships rather than relying mainly on formulaic signposts.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “unemployment,” “income,” “local residents,” “discounts,” and “walking distance,” so the reader can identify the main subject and concerns. However, the range is limited and several spelling errors or inaccurate word choices make parts of the response difficult to interpret, particularly “Shifting tpwars the malls becoming trent” and “plathora of discounts.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “extreme discounts on the every product” and “worthfull.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “employment opportunities,” “affordable transport,” and “a wider product range” would help express your ideas clearly without relying on awkward or repeated wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a conditional example: “if local shops are starts to close then people who are working there lose their jobs.” This shows an effort to explain cause and effect, but the verb forms and sentence construction are often inaccurate, and these errors sometimes make meaning harder to follow. For example, “it reduce the local econmy” needs subject–verb agreement, while “it will not only takes their job but also lose their income” has problems with verb forms and parallel structure. The opening sentence is also incomplete or unclear. Practise building accurate sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, articles, plurals, and punctuation. A wider range of structures will be more effective when basic forms are controlled.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.