Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.
Is this a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Nowadays, individuals prefer to dp shopping in big malls instead of local shops which resulted into a closure of small businesses. Although this trend have some positives like people can enjoy muliple ammenities at one place, it also affetcts negatively like closure of local shops and affecting local economy.
The first positive development of this trend is malls have multiple ammenities within single premise. Malls have number of multinational brands, dedicated food zone and game zone for chidren all under one roof which allows families to spend whole day without leaving a mall. Parents can explore multiple stores while children can enjoy games in gamezone. Moreover, whenever they feel hunger they can enjoy delicious food in dedicated food zone within same mall.
However, popularity of shopping malls can resulted into closure of small businesses as their revenue starts dropping significantly. If people started buying goods from malls then their sales started dropping significantly so they cannot sustain to bear expenses like paying rent or their employees salary. So they have to close their shop to stop bearing losses. In addition, Local shops mostly sell stuffs produced locally so if large customer turnover towards mall can affect local economy as malls have mostly international brands so money spent by customers mostly goes out of country.
To conclude, growing popularity of shopping malls is beneficial for families can do multiple activities at single place without leaving that building, though it can affect local shops and economy due to less sales and profits.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both sides of the question and make your overall view clear: malls offer convenience and activities for families, but their growth harms local shops and the local economy. The examples of food and game zones help explain the benefit, while falling sales and the loss of locally produced goods support the negative side. However, the response does not clearly decide whether the development is positive or negative; the conclusion mainly repeats both effects. The economic point that money spent in malls goes abroad is also asserted rather than explained or illustrated. To strengthen the response, state your judgement explicitly and develop the less-supported claims with a specific example or a clearer explanation of their consequences.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on the benefits, a paragraph on the drawbacks, and a conclusion. The progression from family convenience to the effects on small businesses is easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “In addition” help signal relationships between ideas. Some connections are less smooth because several points are packed into long sentences, particularly the explanation of falling sales and business costs. The conclusion also repeats the two sides without resolving the position established in the introduction. For stronger progression, make the relationship between each claim and its consequence more explicit, and use the final paragraph to give a definite answer to the question.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “multinational brands,” “local economy,” “revenue,” and “sustain,” and these choices communicate the main ideas. There is some range in describing the mall’s attractions and the pressures on small businesses. However, inaccurate spelling and word choice are noticeable, as in “muliple,” “ammenities,” “chidren,” and “stuffs.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “customer turnover towards mall” and “their employees salary.” Repetition of “mall,” “local shops,” and “sales” limits flexibility. Work on accurate spelling and natural collocations, and choose more precise expressions when describing customer behaviour and business costs; this will make the argument clearer and more fluent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a concessive opening with “Although” and conditional structures such as “If people started buying goods from malls.” Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “this trend have” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, and “can resulted into” uses an incorrect verb form. The sentence beginning “If people started…” shifts inconsistently between past forms and the present consequence, while “families can do multiple activities” is missing a grammatical link such as “because.” Articles and plural forms also need attention in phrases such as “within single premise” and “their employees salary.” Review agreement, verb patterns after modal verbs, and sentence construction, then proofread for these issues.
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