Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or malls to do their shopping.

Is this a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Cities are developing at a rapid growth rate and attracting various busniesses and customer attraction points into the cities such as shopping centres, malls, cinema houses and restaurants. Many small local shops have been impacted due to this or has been closed as many customers now preferred to do shopping from shopping centres and malls. Many customers choose to visit shopping centres and malls, not only for shopping but also to enjoy quality time with family & friends and enjoy a dinner or watch a cinema at cinema houses adjoining shopping centres.

Many local shops have been in the market for many decades and customers were doing their shopping from local shops because of which local shops were also in the business and were earning a good share of income. Customers were buying the things which they only needed from the shops as shops were not providing fancy things and many other unnecessary things which many customers tends to buy, most of which they actually do not need.

Large shopping centres and malls has become a place where now customers can get all the things they wants to buy and can save large sum of money due to various saving schemes and offers such as rollback, sale or clearance. Additionally, shopping centres not only has become a place to do grossary but it has become a place which has all the facilities like restaurants, fast food services and various entertainment services as well. Most of the family prefers to not only shop at malls and shopping centres, but also consider it as good time to visit a location and spend some time with family and enjoy.

To conclude, personally i consider it as positive development as it provides numereous benefits to shoppers by various deals and offers. However, there are still many local shops are available where old aged customers preferred to shop and enjoy some good old time with the people and community.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider the growth of malls a positive development, mainly because of discounts, convenience and entertainment. These are relevant reasons, and you also acknowledge that local shops remain useful to older customers and the community. However, the response develops the benefits of malls much more fully than the consequences of local shops closing. For example, you explain that shoppers can find many goods and enjoy family activities, but you do not explore what communities may lose when long-standing shops disappear, such as personal service or local employment. The point about customers buying unnecessary items is relevant but could be connected more clearly to your overall judgement. Develop both sides of the issue and support key claims with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, with the main position stated at the end. Ideas within the paragraphs are generally related, and transitions such as “Additionally” and “To conclude” help signal movement. However, progression is not always clear: the second paragraph shifts from the history of local shops to customers’ purchasing habits without explaining the connection, while the third paragraph combines savings, shopping choices and family entertainment. Some linking is also repetitive, particularly the repeated references to shopping centres and malls. Organise each body paragraph around one main reason, use clearer references to avoid repeating the same nouns, and make the relationship between each example and your argument explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “clearance,” “saving schemes,” “entertainment services” and “community,” which helps communicate the subject. There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “adjoining shopping centres.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “customer attraction points,” “rapid growth rate,” “do grossary” and “good share of income.” Spelling errors such as “busniesses,” “grossary” and “numereous” also reduce accuracy. These issues do not prevent the reader from understanding your main ideas, but they make the writing less natural. Build accuracy by learning common collocations for retail and community impacts, and proofread spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “as” and “not only…but also.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main meaning is generally understandable. However, some errors in agreement, tense and sentence construction remain. For example, “Many local shops…has been closed” should use a plural verb, and “Large shopping centres and malls has become” has the same agreement problem. In “all the things they wants,” the verb does not agree with its subject. The phrase “there are still many local shops are available” also combines two sentence patterns incorrectly. Review subject–verb agreement and practise checking each clause for a complete, correctly formed structure.

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