Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants.

Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter

• remind him when and where you met
• tell him what kind of job you are interested in
• say why you think you would be suitable for the job

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ................. ,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing this letter to you about my possible job at your restaurants. As we met last month in a plane journey so I talked with you about my profile and asked for a possible job in your restaurant . As you told me in case in any opportunity will there in your restaurant as per my profile you will connect with me through email.

As per my profile I did masters in Hotel Management in finance. So I am interested to take the accounts department in your restaurant. Even I will help you in future how you will go for the IPO (Initial Public Offers) for your hotel industry. For example you want to expand your bussiness and you need money so there are two possiblities either you will go for loan or take money from the market which is public issue. So they will investment in your firm and earn profit

In finance field you can give me multiple finance work on your rstaurants firm . I will manage all. That's the reason I am suitable for finance job.

Please do the needful for me.

Yours Faithfully,

Bharat Vaswani

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address the main purpose by asking about a finance-related role and explaining your Hotel Management background. The discussion of helping with an IPO also gives a relevant reason for your interest. However, the meeting details are incomplete: “last month in a plane journey” does not identify where or on which journey you met, and the job request is not stated clearly as a specific position. Your suitability is asserted in “I will manage all” rather than supported with relevant experience, skills, or examples. The letter therefore covers the task only partially, with key ideas under-developed. To strengthen it, remind him of the flight more precisely, name a role such as accounts assistant, and give concrete evidence of your financial or hospitality skills.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The letter has a recognisable structure, with an opening, paragraphs about your background and interest, and a closing. The ideas are broadly grouped by topic, so the reader can follow the general purpose. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the explanation of an IPO becomes lengthy and distracts from your suitability, while “In finance field you can give me multiple finance work” repeats the earlier point without developing it. Linking phrases such as “As per my profile” and “That's the reason” are used mechanically, and the first paragraph combines several ideas in a confusing sequence. Organise the letter around the three requested points, use clearer transitions, and ensure each paragraph advances one main idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the subject, including “Hotel Management,” “accounts department,” “IPO,” “loan,” and “public issue.” These terms show an attempt to discuss finance and business rather than relying entirely on general language. However, the range is limited and several word choices or spellings make the letter less natural, such as “plane journey,” “take the accounts department,” “bussiness,” “possiblities,” and “rstaurants.” “They will investment in your firm” also uses an unsuitable form and unclear reference. Choose more precise professional expressions, such as “flight,” “apply for an accounts role,” and “investors could invest in the business,” and proofread spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example, “As you told me in case in any opportunity will there in your restaurant…” and the explanation beginning “For example you want to expand…”. However, these complex attempts are often faulty, and the reader has to work to understand the intended meaning. Verb forms and sentence construction are problematic in “I did masters,” “you will connect with me,” and “they will investment”; articles and prepositions are also inconsistent. Punctuation is sometimes missing or misplaced, including the space before the full stop after “restaurant .” Use shorter, controlled sentences first, then add complex structures only when you can maintain accurate tense, agreement, and clause order.

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