Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-31

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants.

Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter

• remind him when and where you met
• tell him what kind of job you are interested in
• say why you think you would be suitable for the job

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ................. ,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear sir,

I am Writing this letter to just remind you that we both meet in the airplane which was going from Toronto to Edmonton on last Sunday. During the general talks you mentioned that you have your own restaurant in the heart of the city named as " The Taaj". During that conversation you mentioned that Your company always hiring the staff since it is a big hospitality group.

I would be very grateful if I will get Job in your company. I am interested in working as a manager in management group. The reason for only that position is that I had completed my graduation in Business analysis course, and I know every trick regarding how to make business more profitable along with increase in efficiency and effectiveness. At last, I want to say that my Resume is attached with this letter. I am extremely waiting for your response.

Thank you so much for your time to read this letter

Himanshu

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter covers all three bullet points: the meeting context, the desired role, and the candidate's suitability. However, the tone is inconsistent for a professional letter. While the purpose is clear, the development of ideas is somewhat simplistic. For instance, the explanation of suitability relies on general claims about 'tricks' and 'business analysis' without providing specific, professional evidence of experience. The opening 'Dear sir' is also too informal for a business context where a name or 'Dear Mr [Name]' would be expected. To reach a higher band, the candidate should adopt a more formal register and provide more concrete, professional justifications for their suitability.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical sections, moving from the introduction to the request and finally the closing. However, the paragraphing is insufficient; the entire body of the letter is presented as one block, which hinders readability. Cohesive devices are used, but they are somewhat mechanical (e.g., 'At last', 'During the general talks'). The flow between sentences is generally clear, but the lack of paragraph breaks makes the text feel dense. Improving the use of linking phrases and ensuring clear paragraph separation would significantly enhance the logical progression of the letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band. Phrases like 'general talks' and 'every trick' are informal and imprecise in a business context. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'always hiring the staff' (should be 'is always hiring staff') and 'I am extremely waiting' (which is not a natural collocation). While the candidate successfully conveys their meaning, the range of vocabulary is limited to basic business terms, and there is a lack of flexibility in expressing professional intent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but accuracy is inconsistent. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'we both meet' (should be 'met'), 'if I will get Job' (should be 'if I could get a job'), and 'graduation in Business analysis course' (should be 'graduated with a degree in...'). Punctuation is also problematic, particularly with capitalization (e.g., 'Writing', 'Job', 'Resume'). While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over complex structures, keeping the score in the mid-range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.