Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants.

Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter

• remind him when and where you met
• tell him what kind of job you are interested in
• say why you think you would be suitable for the job

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ................. ,

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Respect Sir,

I hope you are doing well. I am Asma Abdulsalam Bhakti.It was really a pleasure meeting with you last week on 4 october on a plane.I sat next to you and during our talk I got to know about your profession that you are a restaurant bussiness owner.You influenced me so much with your talk about life goal,bussiness.

In this talk you suggested me to contact you for available job in your one of the restaurants in future.

So I am writing this later to request you that if you have any opportunity available in your restaurant I would like to join as your team, I have applied in your restaurant via your restaurant website.I have keen intrest in bussiness, even my education backround is bussiness management.So I have bit knowledge about bussiness and I will try my best to serve in your bussiness.

at the end I just want to give you a word that if you give me this opportunity to show my capability, I will make sure to fullfill my words and your demands.

Sincerly,

Asma

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You cover all three required points: you remind the businessman that you met on a plane last week, explain that you are interested in joining one of his restaurants, and give your business-management education as a reason you may be suitable. The purpose of the letter is clear, and mentioning that you have already applied through the restaurant website adds relevant detail. However, the job you want is not specific: “join as your team” does not say what role you are seeking. Your suitability is also only briefly explained; you could connect your studies to particular duties or add relevant experience or personal qualities. Develop these points more fully and use a suitable formal greeting and closing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The letter follows a generally sensible order: you recall the meeting, refer to his suggestion, make your request, and explain your background. This makes the overall message understandable. Some links between ideas are less smooth, however. For example, “In this talk” repeats the earlier reference to your conversation, while “So I am writing” and “at the end” make the progression sound mechanical. The long request paragraph combines your desired job, application, interest, education, and knowledge without clear separation. Use distinct paragraphs for the meeting, your request, and your suitability, and connect each idea with more natural transitions. This would make the organisation clearer and cohesion less repetitive.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main purpose, including “suggested,” “opportunity,” “education background,” and “capability.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the letter sound unnatural: “restaurant business owner,” “join as your team,” and “give you a word” do not express the intended meanings idiomatically. Spelling errors such as “bussiness,” “intrest,” and “Sincerly,” along with repeated use of “business,” also reduce precision. Choose more natural phrases for applying for a role and describing your qualifications, and proofread spelling. This will help you express the same ideas more clearly and professionally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally follow your meaning. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly in sentence boundaries, articles, and prepositions. For example, “I am Asma Abdulsalam Bhakti.It was” needs a space and clearer punctuation, while “I sat next to you and during our talk I got to know” would benefit from commas or restructuring. “In your one of the restaurants” has an incorrect article pattern, and “suggested me to contact” uses an incorrect verb pattern. The final sentence, beginning “at the end,” is also difficult to control. Practise accurate sentence construction and common verb patterns, while retaining your attempts at longer sentences.

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