Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You work for an international company, and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter

• explain why you want to work in the company's head office for six months
• say how your work could be done while you are away
• ask for his/her help in arranging it

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ................. ,

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Dear administrative manager

I abc.working in your department as a employee.i have a more than 3 year experience in your organization.i recently know that our department collaborate with an international company and our organisation find some people who work with an international company.so I am inform you to please let me know the process of that recruitment and I am a part of this organisation so I am willingly ready to work in international company and gain a great experience and knowledge.a part of that I already done work with international company for 6 months so I have little experience of international company.before joining hear I am working in international company as a employee so I hve little bit of work experience and I want to improve my knowledge and skill with work with this wonderful and growing company.so as your employee please help me to share details and requirement criteria for employment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to address two of the three bullet points in the prompt. While you express a desire to work at the head office, you do not explain how your current work would be managed or covered while you are away, nor do you specifically ask for the manager's help in arranging the transfer beyond a vague request for information. The letter lacks a professional tone and fails to provide the necessary details required for a formal business request. To improve, ensure you dedicate a paragraph to each bullet point provided in the instructions.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The letter is written as a single block of text, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of paragraphing, which is essential for a formal letter. Cohesive devices are almost entirely absent; the sentences are linked by repetitive use of 'and' or 'so', rather than logical transitions. The progression of ideas is disjointed, and the lack of clear structure hinders the reader's ability to understand the purpose of the letter. Using clear paragraph breaks for each point would significantly improve the flow and logical progression of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive, relying heavily on simple words like 'work', 'company', and 'experience'. There are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'I recently know' instead of 'I recently learned' and 'before joining hear' instead of 'before joining here'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas or professional requests effectively. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning business-related collocations and synonyms to avoid repeating the same words throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammar is weak, with frequent errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and verb tense. There is a lack of capitalization at the start of sentences and with the pronoun 'I'. You rely almost exclusively on simple sentence structures, and even these contain errors, such as 'I am inform you' instead of 'I am writing to inform you'. There is no evidence of complex sentence structures. The frequent errors in basic grammar and punctuation make the text difficult to read and detract from the professional tone required for this task.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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