Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.
Why do many working people not get enough exercise?
What can be done about this problem?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Many employees develop physical as well as mental disorders due to lack of physical activities in their life. This essay argues that chronic fatigue and ignorance are the most common reasons behind this development and it can be solve through adding a compulsory fitness hour in their work schedule.
Most of them have to go through a very difficult schedule, where they have to move constantly to finish their daily tasks which ends up by exhaustion. Therefore, many working women who have to take care of meal, office work and other household cores do not have enough energy to perform any exercise. While many working professionals are used to their current lifestyle and they show resilience towards change. This carelessness leads to affect themselves in long-term by developing obesity related illnesses or life threatening disorders. For instance, some employees in technology industry are willingly ignore their physical conditions and continue their lifestyle without modifying it or adding few sessions of fitness.
The best feasible solution would be sparing an hour from the working schedule, when employees can do physical activities or gym. This hour can decide by the authorities or by the government agency in which every working individual must do exercise. Such kind of initiative would bring revolution in workers' health as people would affect less from the disease associated with over-weight. For example, if the fitness training would become mandatory, employees would be forced to maintain their body well-rounded and fit, and that would possibly reduce the danger of any life threatening diseases.
In conclusion, a number of working individuals are not taking part in their regular exercise training that may cause any dangerous health conditions. I maintain that employees feel lethargic and less attentive towards exercises and this situation could resolve through implementation of compulsory exercise.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation regarding 'working women' and 'household cores' (chores) is a bit narrow and could have been expanded to cover a broader range of working professionals. The suggestion of a 'compulsory fitness hour' is a relevant solution, but the discussion on how this would be implemented in various industries remains somewhat superficial. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by more detailed reasoning or specific, well-explained examples.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. There is a progression of ideas from the causes to the proposed solutions. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Therefore', 'While', and 'In conclusion', though some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is generally clear, although there are minor issues with sentence-level flow, such as in the second paragraph where the connection between 'exhaustion' and 'working women' could be smoother. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and the structure supports the reader's understanding.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'lethargic', 'resilience', and 'feasible'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice or collocation errors, such as 'household cores' (should be 'chores'), 'decide by the authorities' (should be 'decided by'), and 'affect less from the disease' (should be 'be less affected by'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with verb forms and sentence construction. Examples include 'it can be solve' (should be 'solved'), 'some employees... are willingly ignore' (should be 'willingly ignore'), and 'if the fitness training would become mandatory' (should be 'if fitness training became mandatory'). Punctuation is mostly functional, but some sentences are slightly clunky. The errors are noticeable but do not prevent the reader from understanding the intended message.
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