Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.
Why do many working people not get enough exercise?
What can be done about this problem?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In today's world everyone has really hectic schedule and everyone is so busy in their work life that they do not have time for exercise. As a result majority of people are facing health related problems. Everything is getting so expensive so everyone have to work extra sometimes two or three jobs to manage all the expenses.
But in this race they forget to take care of their health and gaining other health related problems. I understand we have to work hard for family expenses and personal savings but we should take care our self as well. They should try to manage their work accordingly so that they can have time for some exercise. For example, I also have a a very busy schedule I am also doing two jobs but instead of driving a car I prefer to walk to go for my job. It takes me twenty minutes to walk for my first job so I save money for gas and also do walk to improve my health.
For my second job I cannot walk because I have to go other city for that. So on those days I get up early in morning and go for morning walk nearby park to do exercise. It is on us that how we are managing our schedule to get time for our health. People should focus on their timetable so that they can manage their work with their health so that they can improve their health with small exercise and walk.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. The reasons provided (hectic schedules and financial pressure) are relevant but could be expanded with more depth or broader societal context. The solutions are also limited to personal anecdotes rather than exploring systemic or workplace-level changes. While the position is clear, the essay relies heavily on personal experience rather than a balanced discussion of the topic, which limits the depth of the response. To improve, you should aim to provide more generalized arguments alongside your personal examples.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow between sentences is occasionally disjointed. There is a reliance on simple transitions like 'But' and 'For example'. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical, and some sentences feel repetitive, particularly in the final paragraph where the same ideas about managing time are restated multiple times. Paragraphing is present, but the transition between the problem and the solution could be more clearly signposted to improve the overall progression of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You frequently use basic phrases such as 'really hectic schedule', 'work life', and 'health related problems'. There is little attempt to use less common or more sophisticated vocabulary. Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'gaining other health related problems' instead of 'developing health issues'. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise collocations and a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary related to lifestyle, health, and time management.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'everyone have to work', 'everyone has really hectic schedule'), missing articles (e.g., 'go other city'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'take care our self'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that articles and prepositions are used correctly in your complex sentences.
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