Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Around almost all the world, it is becoming a common habit of working people to avoid the exercise, either they are busy or have any spare time. Such routine definitely results in a health haphazard, directing towards the disaster if the same habits retain over a long period of time. To overcome the problem, it is the need of the age to take some serious steps on national as well as international level.

In a current scenario, it is a common observation, the working class avoids to do some exercise or any healthy activity. Most of the times, their tight schedule does not permit them to find some extra time even go for a walk. Moreover, if out of of the blue moon, they get blessed with some spare time, they feel themselves tired enough to move a little. Generally, it is believed it becomes their second habit to remain sluggish and clumsy.

If someone indulge himself in such routine, it definitely results in a drastic disaster in his health condition. For instance, i would love to describe my own observation regarding my neighbour. He was in forties, with a very tough routine of morning office hours. While after returning home, he keeps himself busy while completing the online tasks, keep sitting before the computer screne. All that persistent routine resulted in his weak eyesight as well as severe attacks of headache. Moreover, his shoulders slowly got rounded in shape.

With the increasing burden of office as well as online work load, it is getting very common that working class avoids to do any exercise even some healthy activity.All this results in severe health issues. It is the need of the age, government must introduce some reforms. During office hours, some healthy activities must be introduced during tea breaks. Among communities, different interesting competitions must be introduced to encourage healthy activities, like running, football or cricket matches, swimming competitions and much much more. All of such steps would result not only in a healthy society, also the working performance would be enhanced.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as tight schedules and the sedentary nature of office work. However, the development is somewhat repetitive, particularly in the fourth paragraph, which restates points already made in the second. While the position is clear, the supporting arguments could be more nuanced. For instance, the example of the neighbour is a good personal touch, but the analysis of the solutions could be expanded beyond general suggestions to provide a more comprehensive answer. Overall, the task is addressed, but the depth of development is limited.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a progression of ideas from the problem to the consequences and finally to the solutions. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'out of of the blue moon' or 'much much more'. Referencing is generally clear, but the transition between ideas could be smoother. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the essay follows a standard structure, which helps the reader follow the argument, even if the flow is occasionally interrupted by awkward phrasing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and sophistication. There are several instances of awkward collocations and non-idiomatic expressions, such as 'health haphazard', 'second habit', and 'out of of the blue moon'. While the student attempts to use a range of vocabulary, the word choice is often imprecise, which occasionally hinders the clarity of the message. To reach a higher band, the student should focus on using more natural collocations and avoiding informal or misused idioms. Spelling is generally accurate, but the range of vocabulary remains somewhat limited.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'avoid the exercise', 'if someone indulge himself', and 'it becomes their second habit to remain sluggish'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some run-on sentences and missing commas. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. The student demonstrates an attempt at complex structures, but control over them is inconsistent. Improving subject-verb agreement and article usage would significantly enhance the accuracy of the writing.

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