Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.
Why do many working people not get enough exercise?
What can be done about this problem?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Undoubtedly, in this modernized era, Health is the most priority for the people. A good health is good wealth. Most of the working individual have either less time or no time for the exercise which cause several health related issues. As per my observation, due to the busy schedule and use of mobile result in less time for exercise which I will be discuss in the upcoming paragraphs.
To commence with, the first and foremost reason behind the no time for the exercise is because of the busy and the hectic schedule. This is how, in the competitive period, most of the people living in rush life and not even able to finish their important task because of the busy work life. For example, in Canada most of the people used to work double job to manage their expense in inflammatory market. Thus, individuals can also acquire time during the weekends for the workout and balance their life.
Furthermore, the another reason behind the obesity is the use of smart gadget. This is why, in this modernized era, due to invention of new technology which makes life simpler and easy that makes individuals more lazy. For an instance, in the past time people are more engaged in the physical work due to lack of technology but because of the smart device the life become more easier. As a result it can be overcome by creating proper time for the exercise.
In conclusion, people often do not get enough exercise because of busy lifestyles and the increasing use of technology. However, by managing time and reducing unnecessary use of technology.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention 'busy schedules' and 'smart gadgets,' the explanation remains repetitive and lacks depth. For example, the suggestion to 'create proper time' is vague and does not provide a concrete solution. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph fully explores the 'why' and 'how' with more specific, logical examples. Your position is clear, but the overall development is limited by the brevity of the arguments provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'To commence with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'In conclusion.' However, some transitions are used incorrectly or sound unnatural, such as 'This is how, in the competitive period' and 'This is why, in this modernized era.' Additionally, the final sentence of the essay is a sentence fragment, which disrupts the flow of the conclusion. Improving the variety and accuracy of your linking words will help your ideas progress more smoothly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it is often repetitive and occasionally imprecise. For instance, you use 'modernized era' and 'busy' multiple times. There are also some errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'inflammatory market' (likely meaning 'inflationary') and 'no time for the exercise.' To reach a higher band, try to use more precise academic vocabulary and avoid repeating the same phrases. You have a basic range, but you need to demonstrate more flexibility and control over less common lexical items.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Most of the working individual have'), article usage (e.g., 'the exercise'), and tense consistency (e.g., 'which I will be discuss'). There are also several punctuation and phrasing errors, such as the incomplete sentence at the end of the conclusion. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed correctly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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