Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this sophisticated era, majority of working people do not exercise while working and in free time, which causes some health issues. People should do some exercise in order to maintain a healthy life style. This essay will discuss both the problems and solutions to this statement.

Firstly, a large group of people in the job sector do not get enough exercise to lead a healthy life style. For example, people work continuously for long hours to finish the large target given by the seniors without considering the capability of an individual, which result in stress and left with no energy at the end of the day. Moreover, some workers do extra work voluntarily to get the promotion. For instance, because of the competition in a particular industry, people work hard and try to impress the management to earn the respect and wealth, so they completely ignore their health.

On the other hand, it is important to become serious about the health problems an individual is getting during working hard. Company owners should monitor the health of their workforce regularly and introduce some activities according the that. Companies should implement a compulsory exercise session during working hours. Although, it is good idea to provide a free sports or gym membership to the group of people in the company whose work really seriously to accomplish the target.

In conclusion, it is believed by some people that working hard without considering health can give them promotion and money, but health is more important to work hard, so encouraging workers to exercise and give free benefits of gym could be good idea.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as the pressure of long working hours and the suggestion of company-led exercise sessions. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation of why people work long hours could be more nuanced, and the solutions are presented in a slightly repetitive manner. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments would benefit from more specific examples or deeper analysis to reach a higher band. Overall, it covers the requirements sufficiently.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organised into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader through the argument. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are minor issues with referencing, such as 'according the that' in the third paragraph, which disrupts the flow. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the connection between sentences could be smoother to achieve a more natural, sophisticated flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific language like 'job sector', 'management', and 'workforce'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are occasional errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'work really seriously' instead of 'work very hard' or 'diligently'. The phrasing is functional but lacks the precision and variety of less common lexical items that would be expected at a higher band level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'which result in stress' (subject-verb agreement), 'according the that' (preposition error), and 'Although, it is good idea' (missing article and punctuation error). These errors do not impede communication, but they are noticeable. To improve, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and more accurate punctuation when using complex sentence structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.