Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, health issues have become very common in society. Many working people find little or no time for exercise during their working hours or in their spare time. Because their work is mostly in offices and no physical work is required. Companies can overcome these issues by providing various facilities to their employees. In the upcoming essay, we will discuss the given questions with reasons and relevant examples to discuss these statements.

To begin with, work related to consulting, accounting, data management, and banking such jobs are performed by sitting in chairs in front of computers. This work is performed only with mental strength no physical exercise is performed. For example, A recent survey conducted by AHS (Alberta Health Services), that the adult age group from 25 to 50 is impacted by various health issues like diabetes, stroke, eyesight, and cholesterol because they do not perform any exercise throughout the day.

However, this problem can be reduced either by people following an exercise routine, such as going to the gym, yoga, cycling, and walking, by performing from this task at the end of the day, or a company adding this at the workplace and making legal rules in the workplace curriculum. For example, Google had provided an innovative environment in their workplace that they can utilize to improve their health by tracking their physical health records and providing health diet to their employees in the cafeteria.

To conclude, Although many people facing health issue due to not performing physcial activity at work but employees should take care of them self by performing daily exercise and follow health meal at work, and company should promote the health well bei

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention sedentary jobs like accounting and banking, the explanation remains quite general. The solutions provided, such as gym routines and workplace initiatives, are relevant but could be expanded with more specific detail or deeper analysis. The conclusion is incomplete, cutting off mid-sentence, which impacts the overall task completion. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph fully explores the 'why' and 'how' with more depth and ensure the essay reaches a natural, complete conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'However', and 'To conclude' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the sentence structure regarding the survey is fragmented. The abrupt ending of the final paragraph significantly disrupts the coherence of the conclusion. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that sentences are fully formed will help the progression of ideas feel more natural and fluid.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'sedentary', 'innovative environment', and 'physical activity'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'performing from this task' and 'follow health meal'. The vocabulary is generally functional but lacks the precision and variety required for higher bands. To reach a higher score, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and ensuring that words are used in their correct context. For example, instead of 'mental strength', consider 'cognitive demands' or 'sedentary nature of the work'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'work related to... such jobs are performed' (a faulty sentence structure) and 'Although many people facing health issue' (missing auxiliary verb). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the run-on sentence regarding the survey. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to affect the clarity of your writing. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring that every sentence has a clear main verb and complete structure.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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