Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, many working people did not get time to do exercise even in thier free time due to busy lifestyle. because of no exercise so many people suffering from health issues such as heart disease, obesity and many more. which I'm going to discuss into upcoming paragraphs .

There are so many issues but the major issue is long working hours sitting at the desk. peoples get tired for long such a long days eight or more that eight hours shift. when they reach home they prefer to watch television or watching phone or some of them have to do hose chores suchh as prep meals for next day make dinner for thr family , cleaning and lool after the children. People get tired they have to energy to do any kind of exercise and they become more physically inactive and causes many health issues.

However, the more relevant solution of this issue is give 30 minutes or short time break for walking during ti working hours. Companies should give some discount for the office workers for the gym. secondly, encourage the people to walk during the lunch break or use the stairs over thr elevators and use cycle if possible. Governmrnt should build more parks with walking track or running , cycling tracks . So that reduce the health issues.

Inconclusion, busy lifestyle , long working hours or excessive use of technologies are the main issue of health issues ,but the local people or govenmnet can help to reduce the health issye to build more parls eith eacg tracks

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for inactivity and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention long working hours and household chores as reasons, the explanation lacks depth and specific examples. Similarly, the solutions provided, such as gym discounts and park construction, are relevant but could be expanded upon to demonstrate a more thorough exploration of the topic. The introduction is brief and contains some grammatical issues that slightly obscure the clarity of your position. To improve, aim to provide more detailed explanations and concrete examples for each point raised.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For instance, the transition 'However, the more relevant solution' is slightly awkward in context, and the concluding paragraph is quite abrupt and repetitive. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the use of 'the local people' in the conclusion, which does not clearly link back to the previous points. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in addition to') would help create a smoother flow between your ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'thier', 'hose', 'thr', 'lool', 'govenmnet', and 'parls'. Additionally, some word choices are imprecise, such as 'prep meals' (informal) and 'eacg tracks'. While the meaning is generally clear, these errors and the limited variety of vocabulary restrict the score. To improve, focus on learning the correct spelling of common academic words and try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations related to health and lifestyle.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'many working people did not get time' (tense inconsistency), 'peoples get tired' (subject-verb agreement), and 'they have to energy' (missing preposition/article). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several run-on sentences and missing commas. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often faulty. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and using correct verb tenses consistently. Proofreading for basic errors like missing articles and pluralisation will also significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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