Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.
Why do many working people not get enough exercise?
What can be done about this problem?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, getting a health issues of workaholics employees due to their hectic schedule of job is being more common thing because of not spending such time to do exercise to stay healthy. Well, there are many causes and solutions, which are given below.
As we know, higher percentage of working people have has office work or work from home and on account of that main reason, individuals getting tired by seating whole time of working hours on chairs instead of doings hard works, which helps their body or muscles to worm up. Moreover, companies have more workload on employees or every individuals to finish their work within the given time period, that stuck them to finish their work load or given a mentally or physically pressure to finished it by office eventually it affect their body and not getting enough time to utilize on on their selves to keep fit and fine.
Due to this major issue, society has done research to find out the convenient solution to get an extra time during or after the work schedule for working people selves to keep fit and get rid of health issues along with workaholic schedule. For instance, government and WHO - World Health Organization give a notice to every MNC (Multi National Companies) to follow working schedule and provide suggestion to construct exercising area within their companies area, so every individual can spend their after working hours for their body and stay healthy and keep their body fit. However, this solution gives positive feedback of before and after analysis on health issues in working employees. The percentage is higher of having good health by doing extra exercise after or before work as well as in their free time in the research paper as compared to before.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The explanation regarding sedentary work and workload is clear, but the solutions section relies on vague references to 'research' and 'government notices' rather than providing concrete, well-developed examples. The position is generally clear, but the expression of ideas is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing, which makes some arguments feel under-developed. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more specific, logical explanations rather than general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'on account of that main reason' and 'well, there are many causes' feel unnatural and do not effectively link ideas. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the connection between 'society has done research' and the proposed solution is abrupt. While there is an overall progression, the flow between sentences is frequently interrupted by awkward transitions and repetitive sentence structures.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of awkward word choices and non-standard collocations, such as 'getting a health issues of workaholics employees', 'keep fit and fine', and 'stuck them to finish their work load'. These errors occasionally impede the flow of the text. While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'MNC' and 'World Health Organization', the overall range is limited, and the phrasing often sounds like a direct translation from another language rather than natural English expression.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('higher percentage of working people have has'), incorrect verb forms ('instead of doings hard works'), and awkward sentence construction ('that stuck them to finish their work load or given a mentally or physically pressure'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, and some sentences are overly long and convoluted, which makes them difficult to parse. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the text from reaching a higher band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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