Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemporary society, regular exercise has emerged as a subject of intense focus. While the amount of workforce has increased, many working people do not get enough time to exercise or workout which results in many health issues. This essay will examine the workout habits of working people.

To begin with, the foremost reason of not exercising is lack of free time and overwork. In other words, most of the people working in corporate do not leave their workplace on time and add frequent overtime for more money. For instance, in India an average IT employee works around 56 hours and spends 12 hours a week commuting for work. Therefore, most of the Indians cannot find time for workout.

Furthermore, due to the lack of physical exercise we can observe a sharp increase in obesity and heart related problems in people aged between 30 to 40 years. As a result, companies should step in to improve the work culture. This will not only help the workers but a physically fit employee will be 30% more productive for the organisation. By the way of illustration, Germany introduced a 4.5 work-week in 2021 which resulted in a 15% rise in productivity and 10% less hospitalization across the country by the year 2024.

To encapsulate, all the working people should find a way to avoid overwork and take out some time for regular exercise. Even running or playing an outdoor game will help enhance physical fitness. Unless the awareness is not spread about the importance of physical fitness, the world might see a exponential rise of medical issues in upcoming years.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, particularly the mention of long working hours and the suggestion for corporate intervention. However, the development is somewhat uneven. While the example regarding IT employees in India is specific, the discussion on solutions could be more deeply explored beyond the example of Germany. The position is clear throughout, and the essay maintains a consistent focus on the topic. To reach a higher band, ensure that the solutions are linked more directly to the specific reasons provided in the first body paragraph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the causes from the solutions. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'To encapsulate' are used effectively to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be smoother in the second body paragraph. The referencing is generally clear, though the connection between the '4.5 work-week' example and the broader solution could be more explicitly stated to improve the overall progression of ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is sufficient for the task and allows for some precision, such as 'contemporary society', 'corporate', and 'productivity'. There are some minor inaccuracies in collocation, such as 'add frequent overtime' (should be 'work frequent overtime') and 'by the way of illustration' (should be 'by way of illustration'). The student attempts to use less common vocabulary, which is generally successful, though the range is not particularly wide. The tone is appropriate for an IELTS essay, and the errors do not impede communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are some grammatical errors, such as the double negative in the final paragraph ('Unless the awareness is not spread'), which should be 'Unless awareness is spread'. Additionally, there are minor issues with article usage and prepositional phrases. However, the majority of sentences are clear and error-free, and the errors present do not cause difficulty for the reader. The control of punctuation is generally good, and the sentence variety is sufficient to convey the intended meaning effectively.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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