Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this competitive era, working has increased a lot. A lot of employed individuals do very little or no exercise either during their job days or in their leisure time , and gets health issues. This essay will analyse the reasons along with solutions of this notion in forthcoming paragraphs.

To commence will the former one, the main reason is fatigue. To explain this, many people gets tired of working everyday. This diminishes their potential to work for their own body. Even in their leisure time they feel having very less energy in their body. For instance, BBC news had figured out that many youngsters working night shifts were suffering from many health issues such as depression, stress. These individuals do not even exercise because of their lack of potential. Hence, their companies should either set a particular day in weak in which they could exercise in their company gym or they should ask every person to do exercise in early morning before starting their work.

Shifting towards other notion, usage of time to do other stuffs . To explicate this, employed people prefer to use their time in other stuffs such as completing their daily chore, going out in their leisure time rather than exercising because gyms are getting to much expensive these days. For instance, many internationals students prefer to spend their time in doing their pending house works rather than spending money for exercising in gyms. Hence, government should set free memberships for international and national students to gyms. This could assist them to spend their time in gyms, exercising and keeping their bodies fit and healthy.

To conclude, although there are various reasons for not exercising such as tiredness and inflation, yet these can be solved by authorities by providing free gym memberships to individuals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as fatigue and financial constraints. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the suggestion that companies should mandate exercise before work is a bit simplistic and lacks nuance regarding feasibility. The response covers all requirements, but the depth of analysis could be improved to reach a higher band by exploring the societal or psychological aspects of the problem more thoroughly.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence', 'Shifting towards', and 'To conclude'. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'To commence will the former one'. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes slightly unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. Overall, the structure is coherent, but the use of cohesive devices lacks the flexibility required for a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'notion' and 'explicate', though these are sometimes used slightly awkwardly. There are also some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'stuffs' (which is informal and uncountable) and 'internationals students' (should be 'international students'). The range is sufficient to communicate, but lacks the precision and natural collocation expected at higher levels.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('many people gets tired', 'a lot of employed individuals... gets health issues') and preposition errors ('day in weak' instead of 'day in a week'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are persistent and indicate a lack of control over more complex grammatical structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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