Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Well, In the modern era, as everybody has a job and didn't get time to work on themselves. As the individual is working 9 to 5 didn't get time for themselves which result into serious health issues.

Firstly, the primary reason is that due to the modernization every person is dependent on a technology. With this, they have to do the work activities which is in a sedentary mode where you have to just sit up and do the work which leads serious health issues in sedentary workers like heart problems, obesity, nutritional deficiencies.

Secondly, the main reason is due to workload stress, and anxiety where the individual didn't perform exercise because they have to work all days which leads to pressure on their mind. Moreover, when they get break from their work they just want to release themselves from a hectic schedule. And on day off they just want to rest up well so they can prepare themselves for the next day.

Beyond this, we have to take some steps to solve this issue as we can collabrate with a government. So, take that government can see this issue on a serious note and take actions to preserve the health of the society. They can take steps like opening of gym and organising a yoga classes for free so more and more individual can come and participate the yoga class relax up their mind and body.

Another step would be like government has to make a strict policy for companies that the worker get 2 days off and have break at their workplace so they can relax up themselves and motivated to do the work with more confidence.

As, I see these are the critical points which will enhance the exercise of the individual and make a healthier society.

These all are essential because I remember the one recent corporate survey showed that over 60% of office workers blamed work-related fatigue for their inactive lifestyles. With these steps, like providing yoga classes & giving gym membership finally, individuals must prioritize their health by choosing active commuting methods, such as walking a cycling short distances instead of driving.

To sum up with, prolonged working hours and extreme fatigue are the primary obstacles preventing working people from exercising. However, by implementing workplace fitness programs and improving public recreational infrastructure, this unhealthy trend can be effectively reversed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: reasons for the lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as sedentary work environments and workplace stress. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The explanation of why people do not exercise is clear, but the solutions, particularly the role of government, are slightly repetitive and could be more nuanced. The inclusion of a specific example regarding a corporate survey is a positive feature that adds weight to the argument. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully explored with more depth rather than listing several similar ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. There is a clear progression from the problem to the solutions. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Beyond this' or 'To sum up with'. Additionally, some transitions between sentences are abrupt, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the sentence 'So, take that government can see this issue'. Improving the variety and natural flow of linking words would enhance the overall coherence of the piece.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'sedentary mode', 'nutritional deficiencies', and 'recreational infrastructure'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing, such as 'relax up themselves' and 'collabrate with a government'. Some expressions are repetitive, and the range is somewhat limited. To improve, the student should focus on more precise collocations and avoid informal phrasal verbs in an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('every person is dependent', 'the worker get 2 days off') and article usage. Some sentences are run-on or lack proper punctuation, which occasionally impedes the flow. While the student attempts complex structures, they are not always error-free. To achieve a higher score, the student needs to focus on consistent control of basic grammar and ensure that complex sentences are constructed with greater accuracy.

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