Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

All around the world, people have become so workaholic that they get little to no time to look after their physical health. This essay will not only state the main cause of this problem like being unable to maintain the balance between personal and professional life but will also provide some remedies such as fix scheduling and Breaks between work to fix it.

One major cause of why working-class are leading a sedentary lifestyle is because they fail to maintain balance between their personal and professional life. Working 8 or even 9 hours a day leave no time for them to excercise such as, running, swimming and walking. Consequently, this leads to many health and mental issues like obesity, stress and anxiety. Additionally, working for such a long and demanding hours requires a lot of energy and by the time individuals finish their work they may find themselves completely drained up, leaving no energy to excercise.

One solution is that employees should work at a fixed schedule, meaning not working overtime just to impress their employers or get the task done early. For instance, many people hesitate to say no to their employer because of the fear that their perception in their boss's mind might get ruined which ultimately result in working more than required. Furthermore, taking breaks between work in office is really important to relieve your brain from the stress. These breaks could be used by going to the office gym or doing some phyisical activities with colleagues.

All on all, Although, mixing up the professional and personal life is the primary reason for workers failing to do exercise. However, i believe that adopting techniques like fix scheduling and taking appropriate breaks from work can help them solving this grave problem.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for lack of exercise and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as the imbalance between work and personal life and the suggestion of fixed schedules. However, the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the suggestion of 'breaks' is mentioned but could be expanded with more specific examples of how companies can facilitate this beyond just an office gym. The position is clear throughout, but the essay would benefit from more depth in the analysis to reach a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the causes from the solutions. Cohesive devices such as 'Consequently', 'Additionally', and 'Furthermore' are used to link ideas. However, there are some minor issues with cohesion, such as the slightly awkward phrasing in the conclusion ('All on all, Although...'). The flow is generally smooth, but the transition between sentences could be more sophisticated to achieve a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task. You use some good topic-specific terms like 'sedentary lifestyle', 'professional life', and 'remedies'. However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward collocations, such as 'fix scheduling' (should be 'fixed schedules') and 'drained up' (should be 'drained'). There are also a few spelling errors like 'excercise' and 'phyisical'. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensuring correct spelling of common academic terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('working-class are', '8 or even 9 hours a day leave') and punctuation errors (the comma usage in the conclusion). There are also minor errors in word form, such as 'help them solving' instead of 'help them solve'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher band score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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