Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

' A healthy body help maintains a health mind ',having a healthy and active lifestyle inculcates freshness and focused mind. Although, with the stressful lifestyle today's generation having is really diverting the attention from dailly excercise. In following paraghraphs, causes and solutions will be provided.

In current hectic work environment, population have seen not focusing on physical activities like they used to. A mojor role in this is the extreme presure of work culture, where people take there stress with them after the working hour. Increase dominance of office related stress submerge employees in thinking or procastinating, rather than motivting them to think about other varients of life. Commonly, metro-politan cities have these crude work ethics where we can see people are busy in meetings, rusing towads offices and discussing there situation with phychologists. Moreover, advancements in lesuire activities might cause distractions and involvement of social media is also one of the prominent factor. Masses are directed attention span towards their mobile devices, wether to see content or to play vertual games. Dominent example is Tiktok and instagram, which have a feature of 'Reels', users of these applications glued to the screen for hours rather involving in something productive.

However, there are no problems that cannot be cured. Instead of creating awareness in public speaches, introduction to healthy mindset should begin from schools. Educational institutions creates a longlasting imapact in life of child, if habit of physical activity starts as early as in schools, it could reamain with them throughout their life. China, is the best example in this context as they focus more on young pupils to learn and exercise as a part of daily routine. Furthermore, a proper schdule involving time for gym and doing other chores could be introduced in having a well versed lifestyle. This could give plethora of time to be productive and attentive while remaining healthy.

In concution, with the proper discipline and time management, anyone could achieve thier desired results. Wether to tackle a health related problem or stress at work, indulging in physical activities makes life easy in numerous ways.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, exploring both the reasons why working people lack exercise and offering viable solutions. The student establishes a clear position from the introduction and maintains it throughout the essay. Relevant ideas are presented, such as workplace pressure and the distraction of social media like TikTok and Instagram, alongside constructive solutions like school-based habit formation and better scheduling. However, some ideas remain slightly under-developed; for instance, the discussion on work culture could be extended with more specific elaboration on how modern job demands physically restrict daily movement. The response fully satisfies the requirements for the lower band while showing glimpses of fully extended ideas characteristic of the next level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression of ideas from causes in the second paragraph to solutions in the third. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, separating the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion distinctly. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', and 'However', though referencing and cohesion can occasionally feel somewhat mechanical or repetitive. For example, transitional phrases sometimes introduce new points abruptly rather than flowing seamlessly from the preceding sentence. The progression is clear throughout, meeting all criteria for the stable band while utilizing cohesive tools that point toward more flexible management in higher bands.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, attempting less common items such as 'inculcates', 'metropolitan', 'plethora', and 'procrastinating'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and spelling throughout the text, including 'dailly', 'excercise', 'presure', 'there' instead of 'their', 'rusing', 'towads', 'phychologists', 'lesuire', 'vertual', 'imapact', 'reamain', 'schdule', 'concution', and 'thier'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they restrict the lexical score because precision and control are lacking in more ambitious vocabulary choices. To progress, the writer needs to enhance spelling accuracy and ensure collocations and word forms are used correctly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like conditional and participial clauses. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, such as article omissions ('population have seen not focusing', 'Educational institutions creates', 'habit of physical activity starts as early as in schools'), subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing in introductory clauses. Despite these lapses, the errors rarely impede overall communication, allowing the reader to follow the argument without major difficulty. The presence of both error-free sentences and frequent basic structural slips aligns well with a mixed grammatical profile, satisfying the current band requirements while highlighting the need for greater structural control.

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