Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the modern era, individuals have no enough time to do exercise or for some walk. Life become more busy for working people and in result they effected with many diseases. Because when you do not give proper attention to your body it will give you nagetive signs.

To commence with, people have alot of competition in their work. Mostly people runs their own business and they work hard for their business more than 12 hours. Moreover employees ars also stuck with their long duties because they earn enough money to fulfill their needs. Thus they cannot focus on their physical health. For instance, In USA duty time is just 8 hours. After that they have enough time to go ta gym or do some exercise because this duty do not make them tired.

On the the other hand, we should know about the importance of our health. people conscious about their health when they got sick or had a physdical disability. In my perspective earning money is an important factor but individual must take out some time for daily exercise. Its not make them healthy but also improve their capacity to doing hard work. You don't do exercise for long time its just take half an hour and if you are more willing just do it for 1 hour. Its fresh your mind and you will get more better ideas for business.

In conclusion, excercise has nomurous benefits on humans health. individuals who are working or those who have free time but dont do exersice because of laziness, loss their health with the growing age. Every individual should must aware about keeping himself healthy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses both questions: it identifies long working hours and work pressure as reasons for insufficient exercise, then recommends making time for daily activity and recognising its health benefits. These points are relevant, but they are only partly developed. For example, the claim that business owners work more than 12 hours is not explained or supported, and the comparison with an eight-hour duty period in the USA does not clearly show why this is typical or how it solves the problem. The proposed solution mainly places responsibility on individuals; practical measures by employers or workplaces are not explored. The position is generally understandable, but the discussion needs clearer, more specific explanations and examples to address the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph about causes, a paragraph about health and exercise, and a conclusion. Basic linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “Thus,” and “On the other hand” help signal relationships between points. However, progression is not always clear: the second body paragraph shifts from the importance of health to advice about exercise and then to its benefits for business ideas, without developing one central line of reasoning. Some connections are also inaccurate or repetitive, and the conclusion introduces laziness even though this was not established as a main cause earlier. Organise each body paragraph around one clear purpose and use linking phrases only where the relationship between ideas is precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses a basic range of vocabulary relevant to work, health, and exercise, including “competition,” “physical health,” “daily exercise,” and “capacity.” This is enough to communicate the main ideas, but word choice, collocation, and spelling errors are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear. Examples include “no enough time,” “nagetive signs,” “more better ideas,” and “loss their health.” Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “people conscious about their health” and “duty time.” Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise language for workplace pressures and practical exercise solutions would also help you explain your ideas with greater clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay includes simple sentences and attempts some longer structures, for example, “Because when you do not give proper attention to your body it will give you nagetive signs.” However, the range is limited, and complex sentences are often faulty. Frequent problems with verb forms and agreement appear in “Life become more busy” and “people runs their own business”; other examples include “they effected with many diseases” and “Its not make them healthy.” Articles, sentence boundaries, and punctuation also need attention, as in “In my perspective earning money is an important factor but individual must take out some time.” These errors can make the reader pause to interpret the intended meaning. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete sentence patterns before adding more complex structures.

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