Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Most of the population that have jobs rarely spend time exercising whilst working and in their own spare time. Consequently, many individuals are faced with health issues with many people believing they do not have sufficent time to exercise. Despite this, I believe people could make better use of their time.

Undoubtetly, for most people who are employed, it is hard to exercise adequately whilst working full-time. Those who are working spend most of their time occupied by their job and it can be difficult to exercise when you are working for most of the day. Moreover, many jobs do not involve exercise, such as office jobs. Not only are people in these jobs spending the majority of their day at work they are also not afforded the opportunity to exercise while they are at work. In addition to this, a lot of people find it challenging to incorporate exercise into their busy lives. Outside of work, people may spend time with their family, cook meals and want to see friends and these activities can easily take priority over exercise.

Making better use of time can help increase the number of working people who exercise enough. Many people are not effectively using their time and they are not scheduling exercise into their routine. An example of effective time management is planning exercise before or after work on a suitable day, including a weekend or on a day where people are not working. Another potential option is taking some time out of work to engage in some form of exercise.

To conclude, many of the working population feel their job and busy private lives consumes too much time to enable exercise. On the other hand, if people were more organised and better used their time, they could exercise more frequently.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both questions and maintain a clear overall view: work and personal commitments restrict exercise, while better planning could help. The reasons are relevant and supported with examples, such as office work being sedentary and family, cooking, and friends taking priority. This meets the task well, but the causes are developed more fully than the solutions. The suggestions to exercise before or after work, use a weekend, or take time during work are sensible, yet remain general; explain how employers or workplaces could make these options practical, or give a specific example of a routine. The conclusion restates the main points but does not add support. More balanced development and detail would strengthen the response further.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The essay is clearly organised into an introduction, a paragraph explaining causes, a paragraph proposing solutions, and a conclusion. Ideas progress logically, and linking expressions such as “Moreover,” “In addition to this,” and “To conclude” help guide the reader. The cause paragraph moves from limited time at work to competing commitments outside work, which is easy to follow. Cohesion is generally effective, though some connections are repetitive or could be more precise: “Moreover” and “In addition to this” both introduce further points, while “Despite this” in the introduction does not clearly signal the relationship between the preceding problem and the writer’s view. Use a wider variety of links and clearer references between ideas to make the flow more natural.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for explaining the topic, with useful phrases such as “incorporate exercise into their busy lives,” “time management,” and “priority over exercise.” These choices communicate the main ideas clearly. However, the range is somewhat repetitive, particularly around “time,” “exercise,” and “people,” and some expressions are imprecise or awkward, such as “the working population” and “exercise adequately whilst working full-time.” There are also spelling errors in “sufficent” and “Undoubtetly,” which affect accuracy. Aim for more precise collocations and vary repeated terms—for example, refer to “employees,” “physical activity,” or “sedentary routines” where appropriate. This would make the vocabulary more flexible and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.0

You use a good mix of simple and complex structures, including subordinate clauses and emphatic forms: “Although” is not used, but constructions such as “Those who are working…” and “Not only are people… they are also…” show structural variety. Many sentences are accurate and easy to understand. A few grammatical issues remain. In the conclusion, “their job and busy private lives consumes” has a plural subject, so the verb should be “consume.” In “a day where people are not working,” “when” is more suitable for referring to a day. The sentence beginning “Not only are people…” also needs a clearer parallel structure after “not only.” Continue using complex forms, while checking agreement and ensuring paired constructions are balanced.

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