Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, allocating time for physical fitness has become an increasingly common issue for working people in many parts of the world. This essay will discuss the main problems associated with this situation and suggest some effective measures to address them.

The main reason is more layoffs at work. Due to advancement in technology, many people are spending time in enhancing their skills to stay in the competitive world. For example, with the recent development of artifical intelligence, many employees are spending hours of time at work in adopting AI. Therefore there are not having any time to do exercises. To solve this issue, employers need to intialise few programs to encourage the employees to stay healthy. For example, conducting a 5K run once in a month, giving a coupon to the one who participated, taking the participation into consideration during the employees promotion. Many people may come forward to participate even they are not interested.

Secondly, after a busy day at work, many people spend a lot of time on social media, they feel browsing will give more relaxation than doing an exercise at gym. When once we start browsing, it really very hard for a person to come out of it, sometimes we spend hours of time without noticing the time. To overcome this issue, people need to start few things like turning on the night more for instagram which will give a reminder like it's time to go for bed. By incorporating few things, people can effectively utilize their time in doing exercises and staying fit.

Overall, I believe people need to realise the value of work-life balance, employers need to initialise few programs to encourage employees to stay fit which will help to improve productivity at work. Apps needs to come with new changes like giving reminders to the user about the time they spent.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both questions and maintain a relevant focus on causes and possible responses. The two causes—work-related pressure to keep up with technology and spending free time on social media—are understandable, and you offer measures such as workplace fitness activities and app reminders. However, the first cause is introduced as “more layoffs at work,” but the explanation mainly concerns employees spending time learning new technology, so the link is unclear. Some solutions are also not fully explained: for instance, a monthly run and promotion incentives are suggested, but you do not discuss how practical or effective they would be. Develop each cause-and-solution link more clearly and support it with a specific example to make the response more complete and convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a concluding summary. “The main reason” and “Secondly” help signal the progression, while “To solve this issue” and “To overcome this issue” connect causes to proposed actions. This gives the essay a coherent arrangement. To make the progression more flexible and precise, avoid relying on similar transition phrases and ensure each paragraph develops one clear line of reasoning. For example, the first body paragraph moves from layoffs to technology training and then to employer incentives, although the relationship between these points is not fully clear. Some sentence connections are also awkward, such as the comma splice in “many people spend a lot of time on social media, they feel browsing…” Clearer links and more precise referencing would strengthen cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “physical fitness,” “competitive world,” “work-life balance,” and “productivity.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “participation into consideration” and “incorporating.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “more layoffs at work” does not match the explanation that follows, and “spending hours of time in adopting AI” is awkward. Spelling and word-form errors such as “artifical,” “intialise,” and “initialise” also reduce control. Aim for natural collocations and check spelling carefully; for example, describe employees as “upskilling” or “adapting to AI” rather than “adopting AI.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “Due to” and “When,” and most of the main ideas remain understandable. However, some grammatical errors occur across the response. Examples include “Therefore there are not having any time,” where the verb construction is incorrect, and “When once we start browsing,” which combines two incompatible time expressions. In “Apps needs to come,” the subject and verb do not agree, while “it really very hard” is missing a verb. Punctuation also needs attention in the sentence joining social-media use and relaxation. Practise checking verb forms, agreement, and complete sentence structure, while retaining your attempts at longer sentences.

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