Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

As technology has progressed and working from home has become the new normal many people are deprived of taking out time for themselves or to look after their health.Hectic work schedules and constant pressure to meet deadlines robs one of time needed for physical activity.

Firstly the world has become very technologically dependant.People who were constantly on the go before are now ordering food and groceries because clicking a button has become more convenient.Also desk jobs have gained popularity lately. Majority of offices have desks installed everywhere in the offices and people find it easy to sit all day and work for long hours.

Secondly as more remote jobs are introduced it had added to the laziness of people.Someone who used to get up for work and drive in sunlight and breathe in the morning air will now wakeup to open the laptop screen from the bed.

However no one realises how negatively little physical activity effects human brain and body.Processed food intake is already very appealing to the masses but with no activity an obesity pandemic is spreading all over the world which is giving birth to health issues such as high blood pressure, diabetes and weak bones. Apart from the physical aspect it adds to mental health issues as well where high stress environment will lead to more issues.

In conclusion i would like to suggest that balance is key in life. No matter how stressful work is or no matter how many deadlines need to be met our physical and mental health need to be of utmost priority, because if we do not take out time for ourselves we would not give 100% at work.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You identify several relevant reasons for insufficient exercise, including desk-based work, convenience-driven food and grocery delivery, and remote working. The examples of someone moving from a commute to opening a laptop from bed help illustrate the issue. However, the task asks both why this happens and what can be done, and your response mainly explains causes and health consequences. The conclusion that people should prioritise their health is a general recommendation, but it does not explain practical measures or who should take them. Some points, such as the effects on mental health, are also asserted rather than developed. Address both questions directly by adding specific actions—for example, workplace movement breaks, active commuting, or scheduled exercise—and explain how these could help.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, paragraphs presenting reasons and consequences, and a concluding statement. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “However” help signal shifts between ideas. However, the progression is not always clear: the paragraph beginning “However” moves from the causes to health effects without fully connecting those effects to the earlier points, and the conclusion does not develop the solution part of the task. Some links are also mechanical, with “Firstly” and “Secondly” doing much of the organising. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each cause to its consequence, then give solutions in a separate paragraph. More precise referencing would also help readers follow links between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “meet deadlines,” “desk jobs,” “processed food intake,” “obesity pandemic,” and “high blood pressure.” These choices make the main ideas clear, and some less common expressions show an effort to discuss health and work precisely. There are, however, several awkward or inaccurate choices: “technologically dependant” is not the natural form here, “effects” is used where the verb “affects” is needed, and “weak bones” is imprecise in this context. “The new normal” and “laziness” are understandable but can sound broad or judgemental. Aim for more precise collocations and a neutral academic tone, such as describing reduced activity as a consequence of convenience or sedentary work.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the opening sentence with “As…” and the conditional structure “if we do not take out time…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical and punctuation errors are present. For example, “Hectic work schedules and constant pressure … robs” has a subject–verb agreement error; “as more remote jobs are introduced it had added” mixes tenses; and “Someone who used to get up … will now wakeup” shifts awkwardly between past and future. Several sentences also run together without spaces after full stops, and “i” should be capitalised. Check agreement and tense consistency, and proofread sentence boundaries while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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