Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The lifestyle in recent years have been changed and it has shown significant impact on individuals health. In recent years, number of people fighting with obesity and stress have increased. A substantial population spend very limited time at gym during the working days and take rest in weekends. As a result, their health may have significantly impacted. This essay will outline the reasons and potential solutions to this problem.

To begin, there are several reasons why people have not spent enough time at gym and other fitness centers. The first and foremost reason is cost of membership. Recently, many people have started to work for extra hours in order to feed their family. Concurrently, inflation is continuouslly rising up. As a result, they are running out of time and short of money to pay at gym or doing workout. Furthermore, many single individuals consume fast food and frozen food which has high amount of fat, but due to cheap and easily availibility. people often ignore adverse affect of these food.

To mitigate this problem, governments and business owners should take steps forward. They should explain the quality of food and different ways to keep themselves fit. In order to increase awareness, they can distribute the pamphlet and share the advisory in group meeting to stay healthy. For instance, it would become a good reminder if supervisor talk about health issues and related solutions in the metting before they start work. This can improve their knowledge and they may start focusing on healthy life.

To conclude, although people have an idea about healthy eating, they may end up eating unhealthy food for some reasons. If positive messages across the country has been shared, this problem could be alleviate at certain extents.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both questions and give a relevant overall response: you identify long working hours, limited money, and unhealthy food as contributing factors, then suggest awareness-raising by governments and employers. However, the reasons are not always clearly tied to the lack of exercise: the discussion of fast food explains poor diet more directly than inactivity, and the link between extra work, time pressure, and inability to exercise could be made explicit. The proposed solutions are also limited; pamphlets and workplace meetings may inform people, but you do not explain how they would create practical opportunities to exercise. Develop each main idea with a clearer explanation and a specific example to make the response more complete and convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin,” “Furthermore,” and “To conclude” help the reader follow the main stages, and the central topic remains apparent. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some movement towards more flexible progression. However, links between ideas are sometimes mechanical or unclear: the shift from gym costs and long hours to fast food is not fully explained, and “To mitigate this problem” introduces solutions that focus mainly on awareness rather than directly addressing exercise. Build clearer links between each claim and the task, and use referencing and transitions to show how ideas relate rather than relying mainly on formulaic signposts.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “inflation,” “membership,” “adverse effect,” “awareness,” and “healthy.” These choices show an attempt to discuss both lifestyle and workplace measures, and the main meaning is generally understandable. However, several noticeable word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling problems reduce precision, such as “fighting with obesity,” “continuouslly rising up,” “easily availibility,” and “positive messages across the country has been shared.” Some phrases also sound unnatural, including “take rest in weekends” and “steps forward.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling and word forms carefully. A more precise vocabulary range would help you explain the causes and practical solutions without relying on broad or awkward expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, using structures such as “In order to increase awareness…” and “although people have an idea…”. The paragraphing and sentence boundaries usually make the message understandable. However, errors occur across verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “The lifestyle … have been changed” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “number of people … have increased” needs an article and consistent agreement. In “If positive messages … has been shared,” the verb does not agree with the plural subject, and the conditional construction is not well controlled. Review agreement, tense choice, and article use, then proofread each sentence. More accurate control of these patterns would make your attempted complex sentences clearer.

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