Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 13 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result.

Why do many working people not get enough exercise?

What can be done about this problem?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

it is true that most of the working people do not focus on exercise when they are free from their work as a consequence they suffer from health issues. Although this happen due to some reasons, i believe that people and governement should take effective steps to minimise this problem.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why working people have less time to do exercise in their leisure time. First of all, in modern era, people are more busy in their lives due to more competiton in every fields that is why they can not concentrate on their health because they would more effort to take rewards and bonus from their employer owing to which they do work for a long time as a consequence, they have less time to focus on their health due to which they suffer from anxiety, depression and stress. In addition to it, these days, employed people have less holidays so they have not balance between their work and exercise because when they off their work, they need to spend time family and doing domestic reponsibilities. Therefore, they do not attention on exercise in their leisure time.

On the other hand, regimes and individuals should take best steps to make balance between their work. First and foremost, government should restrict on hours so people can not work overtime as a result, they should have a time to do exercise because Health is Wealth. Moreover, governement should organise a campaign associated with health so people can aware about their health and make a daily routine to do exercise. Apart from it, people should make time table for doing exercise because if they do not attention on health, they suffer from fatal disease including obesity, as a consequence they do not focus on their work in turn of which it would reduce the productivity of their work. Thus, masses follow their routine on daily basis.

To conclude, while hectic lifestyle and more competition are main root of this happening, i believe that government and people should take productive steps to minimise this problem.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question and maintain a clear position that individuals and governments should act. The causes are relevant: you explain that competition and long working hours reduce time for exercise, while family and domestic responsibilities take up free time. Your proposed measures—limiting overtime, running health campaigns and planning exercise—also respond directly to the problem. Some ideas are more fully explained than others: for example, the link between long hours and stress is stated, but the effect of competition on people’s schedules could be made more precise. To strengthen the response further, develop each main point with a specific example or explain how a proposed measure would work in practice.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for causes and solutions, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “In addition,” and “To conclude” helps readers follow the main stages of the argument. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and several sentences are overloaded with linked clauses and repeated cause-and-effect phrases such as “as a consequence” and “due to which.” This makes relationships between individual points less clear. For instance, the first cause paragraph moves from competition to rewards, long hours, and mental health in one extended sentence. Use shorter sentences, vary linking methods, and make references such as “this problem” or “these steps” clearly point to a specific idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for the topic, including “domestic responsibilities,” “overtime,” “campaign,” “productivity,” and “fatal disease.” These choices show an attempt to discuss both causes and consequences beyond basic exercise-related terms. However, noticeable spelling, word-choice, and collocation errors reduce precision, as in “more competiton,” “make balance,” “do not attention on exercise,” and “people can aware.” Some phrases also sound unnatural, including “take rewards and bonus from their employer.” Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling carefully. More accurate phrasing would make your ideas easier to understand and help you use your existing range more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “because,” “although,” and “while,” and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, complex sentences are often faulty or run together, as in the opening sentence, which joins several clauses without clear punctuation. There are also recurring errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction: “Although this happen” should be “Although this happens,” and “they need to spend time family” needs a grammatical structure such as “spend time with family.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, including lowercase “i” and “health” mid-sentence. Build accuracy by separating long sentences and checking each clause for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.