Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child.

Write a letter to the parents. In your letter

• explain why you would like the job
• give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ
• say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

DEAR SIR,

I AM WRITING THIS LETTER TO IMFORM YOU THAT,RECENTLY I HAVE SEEN AN ADVERTISEMENT IN AN AUSTRALIAN MAGAZINE,AND I WOULD LIKE TO JOB .

FRISTLY,CRUEENTLY,I HAVE COMLETED THE FAINAL EXAM OF BCA AT PARUL UNIVESITY.FUTHERMORE, NOW I HAVE QUITE SPARE TIME THUS,I WOULD LIKE TO JOB IN AN AUSTRALIA.AS WELL AS I WOULD LIKE TO GAIN EXPREIANCE FROM THE DIFFRENT KIND OF THE PEOPLE WHOM WORK IN SIGNIFICANTCOMPNEY.

MOREOVER,RECENTLY I GOT FRIST RANK IN THE UNIVERSITY,AND ALSO I AM GOOD PERSON AND CAPABLE TO WORK FOR THIS JOB COMPLETLY.WHEN I DO JOB IT WILL BE FACILITED ME BY MONETERLY AS WELL AS ECONOMICALLY. ALSO I WOULD LIKE TO BRIGHT FUTURE IN UPCOMING DAYS.

LASTLY, WHEN I HAVE SPARE TIME IN AUSTRALIA SO,I WOULDN LIKE SPEND WITH MY PARENTS AND FRIENDS.INADDITION I TAKE PROPER KNOWLAGE FROM THEM AND AKNOWLAGE THIER EXPIRENCE IN THIS COUNTREY.

I HOPE YOU WILL UNDERSTOOD ALL THINGS,KINDLY I AM LOOKING FORWORD YOUR POSSTIVE RESPONES AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

YOUR'S FAITHFULLY,

FAHIM

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the advertisement and give reasons for wanting the position, including having finished your BCA exams and wanting work experience. You also mention your university rank as evidence of ability. However, the response only minimally fulfils the task because it does not explain your suitability for caring for a six-year-old: academic achievement is not a substitute for childcare experience or relevant personal qualities. The free-time point is also unclear; saying you would spend it with your parents and friends does not explain how you would use your time in Australia, and it is uncertain whether they are travelling with you. Develop each point with specific, relevant details, especially your experience with children and realistic activities during your stay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter has a recognisable sequence: an opening, paragraphs giving reasons and qualifications, a free-time paragraph, and a closing. Connectors such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “Lastly” help signal the sections. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and the connectors sometimes feel mechanical rather than showing a precise relationship between ideas. For example, the move from your university rank to being a “good person” and then to financial benefits is abrupt. Several sentences are difficult to follow because ideas are crowded together or punctuation is missing. Organise each paragraph around one task point, use clearer sentence boundaries, and make references such as “them” explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

Your vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors sometimes strain the reader’s effort to understand the message. Examples include “IMFORM,” “COMLETED,” “EXPREIANCE,” and “KNOWLAGE.” Some phrases are also unsuitable or unclear in context, such as “I would like to job,” “significant company,” and “bright future in upcoming days.” You do communicate a few relevant ideas, including wanting experience and having spare time, but the wording is not sufficiently controlled to express them precisely. Learn and practise common phrases for applications and childcare, and check spelling and collocations carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses basic linking structures, but grammatical control is weak and errors frequently affect clarity. For example, “I would like to job” lacks a correct verb construction, while “I hope you will understood” uses an incorrect verb form. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also unreliable, as in “I AM WRITING THIS LETTER TO IMFORM YOU THAT,RECENTLY…”; this makes it hard to identify the main clause and follow the meaning. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with a small range of controlled clauses. Check verb forms after modal verbs, articles, and punctuation, and avoid joining several separate ideas in one sentence.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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