Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a family for six months and look after their six-year-old child.

Write a letter to the parents. In your letter

• explain why you would like the job
• give details of why you would be a suitable person to employ
• say how you would spend your free time while you are in Australia

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear Sir or Madam,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Dear sir,

I was seen your advertisment in magazine you are looking an employee who are care take of your six year old baby I will writing thislettel to showing my intrest in this vacancy.

I am comming from india last year for purpose of study. know i had finish my study. and done a nanny course in australia. now i am a perfationally care taker. I love to care someone who need help becouse of bye nature i am a helping person.

During this couse i also had do this job. my raletive uncle hire me for this job becouse they know how i was perfect person to take care of him old father who are suffered with illness. that time my uncle offer my to stay with him so that i am leaving so close to him father for the purpose of care .

I hope you will accept my as your employee I will wating your warm or promt response.

your faithfully

Alok partap singh

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You show a basic reason for applying: you say you have completed your studies, taken a nanny course in Australia, and enjoy helping people. You also give some relevant childcare experience, including caring for your uncle’s ill father. However, the response only minimally addresses the full task. It does not explain clearly why you want to live with this particular family, and it gives no details at all about how you would spend your free time in Australia. Your suitability is suggested, but the example concerns caring for an older adult rather than a six-year-old, so its relevance needs explaining. Address each bullet directly and add specific, child-focused evidence, such as activities or responsibilities you have handled.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The letter has some organisation: the opening states your purpose, the middle paragraphs give background and experience, and the final lines request a response. This gives the reader a basic sense of the message. However, there is no clear overall progression through all the requested points, particularly because free-time plans are omitted. Several ideas run together, as in “I am comming from india last year for purpose of study. know i had finish my study,” and links between sentences are often unclear. Use separate paragraphs for your motivation, qualifications and experience, and free-time plans. Clearer sentence boundaries and simple linking phrases such as “In addition” or “Outside work” would make the sequence easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to the situation, including “nanny course,” “care taker,” “vacancy,” and “take care of,” so the reader can identify your general topic and experience. However, the range is basic and repetitive, especially around caring, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors strain understanding. Examples include “advertisment,” “intrest,” “perfationally,” and “employee,” where “employer” is intended. Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “I love to care someone” and “warm or promt response.” Build a more precise set of childcare terms and check spelling carefully. Prefer natural collocations such as “look after children,” “apply for the position,” and “I look forward to hearing from you.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to communicate through several sentences and include some longer structures, for example the sentence explaining that your uncle hired you because he knew you could care for his father. However, the range is very limited, and frequent errors in verb forms, sentence construction, articles, and agreement make parts difficult to understand. “I was seen your advertisment” needs a correct past-tense construction, while “I will writing thislettel” has an incorrect verb form. In “who are care take,” the relative clause is not grammatically formed, and “I will wating” also has an incorrect verb pattern. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then join related ideas with correctly formed clauses and consistent tense.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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