Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There has been a drastic change in todays market. In this contemporary epoch, the digitalization is helping to more exposure to both seller and buyer by bringing them closer from different locations easily. With these advantages the local shops around the town and cities facing difficulties to establish their existence. This essay will elucidate that online market will be more successful and in demand in upcoming days then the local dealers.

To commence with, shopping on a online portal has open the gates for easy and legitimate transaction and build up the trust with in the consumers and sellers. The modern technology has enabled the secure platform and provided multiple options of payments and credit for consumers that has help to build the trust that they are getting right product at fair price. In Canada, for example the electronic purchases has been tremendously increased in the last decade and sales reports from the numerous sites such as Ebbay, Amazon and Marketplace shows tremendous growth. Hence, the rise in online shopping has resulted in dropdown of the local market.

Another prime reason for the rise of e-shopping is that is easy and convenient and they have better offer and discount for everyone as compared to old fashioned market. The digitalized market is becoming prime place for shopping that the reason the there is a fair competition for the sellers for all over the world and consumer is getting multiple option and better quality and reasonable price for every product. It's a win-win situation for both seller and consumer, whereas int he local market consumer just have limited number options and there is monopoly prices for the product. Hence, if the buyer is getting different varieties for same item and getting it delivered at home without moving out from the house makes it best option for consumers.

In the conclusion, the small local business might have got affect due to the rise of the digitalized market and also they compatibly better deals and secure mode of payment for the customer which encourage more trust and believe in the e-shopping. According to me the electronic market are the new future of our era and will have more and better option for our consumers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that online shopping will dominate. However, the argument is slightly one-sided; while you mention that local shops are facing difficulties, you do not fully explore the counter-argument or the nuance of whether 'all' shops will close, which is a key part of the prompt. The ideas are relevant, but the development is somewhat repetitive, focusing heavily on convenience and price without exploring other factors like social interaction or the survival of niche local businesses. To reach a higher band, ensure you address the 'all shops' aspect more critically.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. You use some cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Hence', and 'In the conclusion'. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'that the reason the there is a fair competition'. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, for instance, the use of 'they' in 'they have better offer' lacks a clear antecedent. Improving the flow between sentences and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their subjects will help improve the overall cohesion of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'digitalization', 'contemporary epoch', and 'legitimate transaction'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'dropdown of the local market' (should be 'decline') and 'the small local business might have got affect' (should be 'affected'). Some phrasing is also repetitive, particularly the use of 'better' and 'option'. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive descriptors to convey your ideas with greater sophistication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the digitalization', 'the electronic purchases'), subject-verb agreement ('local shops... facing difficulties' should be 'are facing'), and preposition usage ('competition for the sellers for all over the world'). Some sentences are also structurally incomplete or awkward, such as 'the digitalization is helping to more exposure'. Increasing your control over basic grammar and punctuation will significantly improve the readability and accuracy of your essays.

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