Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this rapidly changing world, it is undoubtedly true that digital shopping windows are affecting local shops and in future it could be the reason of closing the actual city businesses. Therefore, People spending more time on online platforms rather than in the market and they have better deals and unique collections. I am totally agree with this given statement. This essay will further elaborate my reasons for my stance in the upcoming paragraphs. Which will lead to a logical conclusion.

First of all, There are adequate evidence of this view, which is sustainable. The top notch concrete reason is window shopping is more popular these days as everyone have a mobile phone in their hand and individuals are avoiding going on local shops, as markets are always full with rush and sometimes people don't have time for shopping. Then they decide on online markets and order their clothing and other essential things. For instance, there are many digital shopping apps available for humans such as Amazon, Shein, Alibaba, eBay, and many more. However, all brand have their own application if some want to order online they can do it easily without wasting their time going to the market. Thus, this trend has effect on local market shops definitely that will lead for closing shops and If something has positive effect it also have some drawbacks too.

Furthermore, Second Reason is that citizens love to buy things cheaper instead of wasting money on the same thing that is they will buy at better deals. In addition, As noticed, there are all the time sales going on in summer and winter on social media. On the other hand, digital market has variety of choice sometime masses are failed to buy stuff from local shops in city then they focus on online shopping and find the items easily. That is the other reason for online shopping growth. Consequently, on local shops very less chance if someone will find a better deal than online. For example, on Amazon deals going on i phone and on wath

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention convenience and pricing as reasons for the growth of online shopping, the argument that all physical shops will close is not fully explored or nuanced. The conclusion is missing, as the text ends abruptly mid-sentence. To improve, ensure you provide a balanced view or a more robust justification for your absolute stance, and always ensure your essay reaches a complete, logical conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow between ideas is sometimes mechanical. You use some cohesive devices like 'First of all' and 'Furthermore', but the transitions between sentences can be abrupt. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'that is they will buy at better deals'. Additionally, the essay ends mid-sentence, which significantly impacts the overall coherence and structure of the response. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring a complete, well-structured conclusion would enhance the logical progression of your arguments.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'digital shopping windows' and 'sustainable'. However, there are several instances of awkward phrasing and word choice errors, such as 'reason of closing' instead of 'reason for the closure of' and 'masses are failed to buy' instead of 'people are unable to buy'. Some collocations are also unnatural, such as 'top notch concrete reason'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that your word choices are contextually appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('everyone have', 'all brand have'), incorrect preposition usage, and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences being run-on or lacking necessary commas. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed accurately.

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