Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The rate of digital shopping will soon lead to the closure of all stores in urban areas to be shut down. This essay will discuss the reasons I agree to this trend.

I firmly believe that online shopping will expand because it offers greater convenience than visiting physical stores. Whereas, shops in towns and cities need transportation that are quite expensive. For example, I needed to purchase a tampon from Oshodi and the only available place to get the product is closed for the holiday, I had to order it online from a website Temu, it was delivered to me in less than 3 minutes. Furthermore, most of the online stores delivers at your doorsteps thereby reducing the delivery time as majority of deliveries are free. This is done in order to promote their businesses. For instance, Last week when I bought a power bank from an oraimo store, it was brought to me and no extra fee was included as courier charge. However, if it was a walk in shop, your transportation cost will be added.

Also majority of the online shops or websites make use of coupons which can be use to get your goods in a discounted prices. To illustrate, Jumia gives 300,000 coupons last week Tuesday, which i made a purchase of a tricycle and that made me not spend a substantial amount of money for it.

In conclusion, buying goods online also create an ambassadorial deals which enables one to be popular and get wealthy. Overall, it reduces transport cost, it is beneficial to individuals and saves time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt by arguing that online shopping will lead to the closure of physical stores. However, the argument is somewhat one-sided and lacks depth regarding the counter-argument or the nuance of the 'all shops' claim. While you provide personal examples, such as buying a power bank or a tricycle, these are anecdotal and do not fully explore the broader economic or social implications of such a significant shift. The conclusion introduces a new, irrelevant point about 'ambassadorial deals' and becoming wealthy, which does not follow from the previous arguments. To improve, ensure your main ideas are fully developed and directly support your central thesis throughout the entire response.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is sometimes weak. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Furthermore' and 'For instance', others are used awkwardly, such as starting a sentence with 'Whereas,' which is a subordinating conjunction and cannot stand alone. The transition between ideas is sometimes mechanical. Additionally, the final paragraph introduces new information that was not previously discussed, which disrupts the coherence of your conclusion. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a single, well-developed idea will help improve the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing, such as 'get your goods' and 'make a purchase of a tricycle'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'ambassadorial deals' and 'walk in shop'. While your meaning is generally clear, the vocabulary is not sufficiently sophisticated to demonstrate a wide range. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific collocations related to commerce and retail, and try to use more precise verbs and adjectives to express your ideas more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'shops in towns and cities need transportation that are quite expensive' is grammatically incorrect, and 'most of the online stores delivers' contains a subject-verb agreement error. You also have issues with sentence structure, such as the fragment 'Whereas, shops in towns and cities need transportation that are quite expensive.' While you attempt some complex structures, they are often inaccurate. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of conjunctions, and ensuring your sentences are complete and grammatically sound.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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