Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Online platforms are growing very rapidly. However, Local shops in towns and cities will be closed. I am totally disargee with this statement because inovation brings opportunity to expand local shops and bring employement opportunity for people. I will discuss my reasons and provide relevent illustration in following pharagraph.

Firstly, Local shops in towns and cities can expand on online plateforms by listing their products on online platforms which can increase the business because they can grab coustmers online and also walk in. For Example, My friend have cloths shop before he sell all prodcuts just walk-in customers when people started buying online he also list his products online. so now he doubled his business and runing easier then beforfe.

Scondly, employer hire more people when business expand on online platform then they need person for packaging, order receiving, Inventory management etc. For example, my friend expand his business on online plateform he hired more people thats create the opportunity.

Moreover, nowadays people can easily buy the products they don't need to shop on store regular hours and they don't need to take half days off from work because of online plateform it is availabe 24 hours.

In conclusion, I am Totally disagree with the above staement. Although, online plateforms is growing quickly ,local stores will be closing because Nowadays innovations is in every single business it's not effecting the local stores that bringing the new opportunity for old systems to convert in new and easily. To illustrate, where i am living currently in that town so many shops are currently available online reason is not online plateform reason is on pricing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have clearly stated your position against the prompt, which is maintained throughout the essay. You provide relevant arguments regarding the expansion of local businesses through online platforms and the creation of employment opportunities. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the explanation of how online platforms create jobs is brief and could be further elaborated with more specific detail. Additionally, the conclusion contains a contradictory statement where you mention 'local stores will be closing,' which undermines your stated position of disagreement. To reach a higher band, ensure your supporting points are fully developed and that your conclusion consistently reflects your main argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your argument. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' and 'In conclusion' to signal the structure. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of referencing is occasionally unclear. For instance, in the conclusion, the transition 'Although, online plateforms is growing quickly ,local stores will be closing' is confusing because it contradicts your previous points. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will help improve the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your main ideas. You use some topic-specific terms like 'inventory management,' 'online platforms,' and 'business expansion.' However, there are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'disargee,' 'inovation,' 'employement,' 'pharagraph,' 'plateforms,' 'coustmers,' 'prodcuts,' 'runing,' 'beforfe') and some awkward phrasing. These errors occasionally distract the reader, though they do not fully impede communication. To improve, focus on proofreading your work to correct common spelling mistakes and try to incorporate a wider range of precise, academic vocabulary to express your ideas more fluently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'My friend have cloths shop'), tense consistency (e.g., 'he sell all prodcuts'), and article usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas and capitalization. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely prevent the reader from understanding your core message. To progress, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that verbs agree with their subjects and that tenses are used consistently across your paragraphs.

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