Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In the modern world, technology has transformed the way people used to do shopping compared to past. Individuals these days have been shifted to new technological innovation such as online shopping which provides greater convenience, range of clothing options and faster delivery are the reasons for their growth. I firmly agree with this view that because of this innovation, all the shops in towns and cities are closing because of fewer customers which results in high operating costs and minimal fashion designs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You state a clear position in the opening: “I firmly agree” that online shopping will lead to shops closing, and you give possible reasons, including fewer customers and high operating costs. However, the response does not develop these points or provide the relevant examples requested. It also does not explain how online shopping causes the stated effects, and the claim about “minimal fashion designs” is unclear. The response is largely an introduction rather than a complete argument, so it addresses the task only minimally. It is also 168 words below the required minimum. To improve, explain each reason with a specific example and consider whether all shops are likely to close or whether some will adapt to online competition.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic progression: it introduces changes in shopping habits, mentions advantages of online shopping, and then states your position. The phrase “because of this innovation” links the final claim to the preceding point. However, all the ideas are compressed into one paragraph, and the long opening sentence makes the relationship between convenience, product range, delivery, and shop closures difficult to follow. There is no developed sequence of supporting points or conclusion. Organise the essay into an introduction, separate body paragraphs for your reasons, and a conclusion. Use clear links between each claim and its explanation so the reader can follow how your argument develops.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “online shopping,” “convenience,” “range,” and “operating costs,” which helps communicate the general subject. There is also an attempt to use more formal phrasing, such as “technological innovation.” However, several expressions are awkward or imprecise: “shifted to new technological innovation” does not naturally describe consumers’ behaviour, and “minimal fashion designs” is unclear in this context. “Growth” is repeated without a more precise description of the trend. Aim for accurate collocations and specific wording, such as describing customers as moving towards online retailers or local shops losing sales. This would make your limited argument clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a complex sentence to connect the advantages of online shopping with its growth, and your main position is understandable. However, sentence control is uneven. In “the way people used to do shopping compared to past,” the comparison is not formed accurately, and “which provides … and faster delivery are the reasons” creates a mismatch between the relative clause and the main verb. The final sentence also combines several claims in a way that obscures their grammatical relationships. Use shorter, controlled sentences to express each point, and check tense, articles, and subject–verb agreement. For example, state that online shopping offers convenience and faster delivery, then explain separately how this may reduce customer numbers in physical shops.

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