Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

"Money can't buy happiness" a famous phrase that we all have heard from our childhood. But many people think otherwise because they believe that we are nothing without having a lot of money. This is true to some extent because people say this from their life experiences, may that be of being avoided or being ingnored, because they are not rich enough. Thus, having huge amount of money will help us to buy anything we need or do anything we want to make ourselves happy. But, there are other things in life that makes people happy such as a healthy family life, a good friends circle and so on.

Living a simple life is not quite an easy task for everyone, people like enjoy the sweetness of luxury at least at one point of their life. Money plays a pivotal role in the livelihood of a person, and it can be used a scale to measure one's happiness. Many people say that if the scale of money is too high, so does their happiness also is. Infact, this is true when we discuss the lives of rich people, as they can do whatever they like, and spend immensely to make themselves and their circle happy. For example, let us discuss the wedding of India's richest man Anil Ambani's son, where they invited many celebrity faces by paying huge amount for their appereances to the function. In addition, it was a multi-day function in which they have incorporated wide variey of food, and various cultural representation from different part the country. This is a perfect example which proves that money can bring immense happiness to one's life.

However, there are several other factors that can bring happiness to a person's life. First one is to have a good family, even though they earn less, they try to adjust with what they have. Another factor is to have some good friends, as they will be available in all our hardships.

In conclusion, it can be stated that, having a huge amount money can bring happiness to one's life because they can acquire or fulfil all there wishes in no time, while there are other factors that determines people's happiness is to have a lovely family and good friends who always stay with us in our good and bad times.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the question and maintains a clear overall view: money can provide enjoyment through luxury and spending, while family and friends also contribute to happiness. The wedding example gives a specific illustration of how wealth can fund an elaborate celebration. However, the explanation of how money makes people happy is developed more fully than the discussion of other sources. Family life and friendship are named, but their emotional benefits are only briefly explained; for instance, the point that friends are present during hardships could be extended with a concrete example. The claim that money can fulfil “all” wishes is also broad. Develop both sides more evenly and qualify generalisations to make the response more complete and convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction presents the two sides, the body paragraphs discuss money and non-financial sources, and the conclusion restates the position. Linking expressions such as “However,” “In addition,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the progression. This organisation is effective, and the paragraphing is appropriate. At times, though, connections are mechanical or the reference is unclear. For example, “First one” and “Another factor” introduce points in a list-like way, while “This is a perfect example” refers to the wedding details without clearly linking them to the broader claim about happiness. Use more precise transitions and make the relationship between examples and claims explicit to strengthen the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The response uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “pivotal role,” “livelihood,” “hardships,” and “cultural representation.” These choices show an effort to move beyond basic wording, and the meaning is generally clear. Some less common expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, however: “used a scale to measure one's happiness” and “the sweetness of luxury” do not express the intended ideas naturally. There are also spelling errors, including “ingnored,” “appereances,” and “variey,” as well as imprecise phrases such as “celebrity faces.” Aim for accurate collocations and check spelling carefully; natural phrases such as “a measure of happiness” and “celebrity guests” would communicate more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “as,” and “even though.” Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. For example, “a good friends circle” has an article and number mismatch, “there are other things … that makes people happy” has subject–verb disagreement, and “all there wishes” uses the wrong possessive form. Sentence construction is also awkward in “people like enjoy the sweetness of luxury” and “if the scale of money is too high, so does their happiness also is.” Review agreement, articles, possessives, and verb patterns, and simplify sentences when a more complex structure becomes difficult to control. More consistently accurate sentences would improve clarity.

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