Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The question of whether having a significant amount of wealth on contribution to prosperous life is a subject of considerable debate. Some people argue that happiness comes with huge savings because they can get access of anything. However, there are other contributing factors which will be discussed in this essay.

Firstly, possession on wealth means having a buying power which is believed to secure the position of high class in the society. As the

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The opening shows awareness of both parts of the question: it mentions how wealth may provide access to things and signals that other factors also contribute to happiness. However, the response stops mid-sentence at “As the” and does not explain either point, give examples, or establish a developed position. The task therefore receives only minimal treatment, rather than a reasoned answer to both questions. The response also falls substantially short of the required 250 words, leaving the main ideas unsupported. To improve, complete the discussion by explaining specific ways money can improve well-being, then identify and illustrate other sources of happiness, such as relationships, health, or meaningful work.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: the first paragraph introduces the topic, and “Firstly” begins a body paragraph. The contrast signalled by “However” also indicates an intended shift from the view that money brings happiness to other contributing factors. Nevertheless, the essay is incomplete, so there is no clear progression through the argument, no developed paragraph structure, and no conclusion. The phrase “which will be discussed in this essay” promises a discussion that does not follow, while the final fragment “As the” interrupts the flow. Develop each point in a separate paragraph, use clear links between the explanation and examples, and finish with a brief conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response attempts some topic-appropriate vocabulary, including “significant amount of wealth,” “considerable debate,” “buying power,” and “contributing factors.” These choices show an effort to use a more formal register than basic everyday language. However, several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “wealth on contribution to prosperous life,” “get access of anything,” and “possession on wealth.” The limited amount of writing also prevents a wider range of vocabulary from being demonstrated. Aim for precise, natural collocations and check that each phrase expresses the intended meaning; for example, say that wealth “contributes to a prosperous life,” people “have access to a wide range of goods and services,” and “possessing wealth” gives them greater purchasing power.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There is an attempt to use more than simple sentence forms. For example, “Some people argue that happiness comes with huge savings because they can get access of anything” includes a subordinate clause, and the opening uses a formal noun phrase. However, grammatical control is uneven: “The question of whether having a significant amount of wealth on contribution to prosperous life is a subject…” does not form a correct construction, and “As the” is an unfinished sentence. The response is too brief to show a sustained range of accurate structures. Practise building complete sentences around a clear subject and verb, and check prepositions and articles in each clause. Completing the essay with varied but controlled sentences would make the argument easier to follow.

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