Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years, people have started believing that you can buy anything and everythinh with money which eventually keep you happy. I strongly disagree, with this opinion because apart from money there are things such as spending time with family and friends or pursuing youe hobby that can help people be happy.

Firstly, I understand that being financially stable is important but that does not always mean to just run after earning more money. With advancements in salary structure as well as profits in business, lifestyle of each and every individual has changed drastically. Moreover, this has also given rise to greediness to a great extent which eventually leads people in buying expensive, unwanted and non helpful stuff.

Secondly, lots of people now-a-days have started side source of incomewhich is necessary for people below poverty line to keep day to day expenses and life running but the others who are doing as they believe that more money will bring more happiness in their lives is completely a false approach. They sould understand that spending time with their family and friends is equally important. Additionally, with a stable amount of money one can live good, health and balance life.

I believe that there are multiple ways people can stay happy. Furthermore, they can focus on pursuing their hobbies, play outdoor or indoor games, listen to music or go in a concert, plan a short trip to visit nearby places with friends and families, etc. Most of the elderly people and children are not deprived of expensive things but are in constant need of love, affection and attention.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that financial stability and earning money is important but that is not the only cause of happy life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you disagree that money is the main route to happiness, and you identify relationships, hobbies and leisure activities as alternatives. These points are relevant, and the examples of older people and children needing “love, affection and attention” help illustrate your view. However, the task asks both how having a lot of money might make people happy and what else can do so. The first part is only briefly addressed through financial stability and meeting daily expenses; explain more directly how money can provide security, access to healthcare or opportunities. Some claims, such as the discussion of side incomes, are also unclear or insufficiently supported. Develop both sides more evenly with specific reasons or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Additionally” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. However, some links feel mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is not always clear. For example, the paragraph about side sources of income moves from people below the poverty line to others seeking happiness without clearly explaining the contrast. The sentence beginning “I believe that there are multiple ways” also introduces a list rather than developing a connected argument. Use clearer topic sentences and explain how each example supports the paragraph’s main point; vary linking expressions and use pronouns or references carefully to avoid ambiguity.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of relevant vocabulary, including “financially stable,” “greediness,” “pursuing your hobbies,” and “love, affection and attention.” This is enough to communicate the main ideas, but several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. Examples include “non helpful stuff,” “side source of income,” “stable amount of money,” and “cause of happy life.” There are also spelling errors such as “everythinh,” “sould” and “incomewhich,” which make the writing less polished. Aim for more natural phrases and check spelling carefully. For instance, describe unnecessary purchases as “non-essential goods” and refer to “a steady income” rather than a “stable amount of money.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “which” and “that,” and most of your meaning remains understandable. However, errors in agreement, articles and sentence construction recur. In the opening, “which eventually keep you happy” does not agree with its subject, and “I strongly disagree, with this opinion” has incorrect punctuation. The phrase “live good, health and balance life” also contains several grammatical form errors, while “people below poverty line” needs an article. Some long sentences, particularly the one about side income, are difficult to follow because the clauses are not clearly connected. Review subject–verb agreement, articles and adjective forms, and divide complex ideas into shorter, accurately controlled sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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