Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Undoubtedly, a lot of money can make people happy in their lives, But that's not an only source of happiness. There could be multiple reasons for that too. The possible motives as well as outcomes will be justified in the upcoming paragraphs with valid reasons and appropriate examples.

Scrutinising the facts from the grassroots level, the first one is that money cannot buy happiness, but it can buy some stuffs that can make you happy. Sometimes prosperity allows you to spend on things you want to do or you want to buy. For instance, a rich businessman named 'Mukesh Ambani' is living in the biggest house of India. That house includes all luxurious amenities like gym, spa, helipad, five storey car park, temple, community hall, hospital,small shopping mall. That comfort of living can gives you peace and joy. Moreover, excessive wealth can gives you social status and fame too. It will allows you to spend without even counting.

Nevertheless, a happy and perfect life is mixture of a lot of other factors. The foremost one is that good family bonding. A joyous family is a real blessing. On top of that, Health is wealth, if you are fit as fiddle then you are consider in catagory of the happy persons. Furthermore, some small achievement and victories can also make you satisfied with your life. Lastly, friends and your circle can makes you happy by just spending social time with them.

Based on the aforementioned reasoning, indeed money is very integral part of living a happy life. However, thats not only factor can make somebody happy and peaceful.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question and maintain a clear overall view: money can provide comfort and status, but happiness also comes from family, health, achievements and friends. The examples of spending on desired things and Mukesh Ambani’s home help explain how wealth may bring enjoyment, while the later paragraph gives several relevant non-financial sources. This meets the task well, but some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the house’s amenities are listed, yet the link between material comfort and lasting happiness could be explored more carefully. The points about health, achievements and friendship are also brief. Develop fewer ideas with specific explanations or examples to make the response more complete and persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on money, a paragraph on other sources of happiness, and a conclusion. The progression from one part of the question to the other is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “Nevertheless,” and “Furthermore” help guide the reader. However, some linking is mechanical or does not express the relationship precisely: “Scrutinising the facts from the grassroots level” is an awkward lead-in, and “Based on the aforementioned reasoning” sounds formulaic. The list of family, health, achievements and friends would benefit from clearer development and transitions showing how each contributes to happiness. Use simpler, more natural links and make references between sentences more explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary and attempt some less common expressions, including “prosperity,” “social status,” “amenities,” and “aforementioned reasoning.” These choices show ambition, and the main ideas remain understandable. However, several phrases are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “some stuffs,” “a happy and perfect life is mixture,” and “consider in catagory of the happy persons.” Some expressions also sound overly formal or imprecise, including “Scrutinising the facts from the grassroots level.” Focus on natural collocations and accurate word forms rather than adding elaborate phrases. For example, describe the house as offering “luxury facilities,” and say that wealth can “enhance a person’s social standing.” Proofreading spelling and phrasing would also improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including contrast with “but” and conditional phrasing such as “if you are fit as fiddle.” The overall meaning is generally clear, but some grammatical errors recur and reduce accuracy. Examples include “That comfort of living can gives you,” “excessive wealth can gives,” and “It will allows,” where modal verbs should be followed by the base form. There are also errors with articles and sentence construction, as in “life is mixture” and “money is very integral part.” The final sentence, “thats not only factor can make somebody happy,” needs a clearer grammatical structure. Review modal verb patterns, articles, and agreement, then proofread each sentence for a complete and accurate construction.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.