Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, people create happiness in different ways. Many people argue that the primary way to be delightful in life is to have much money . Others say there are other things in life which could make people happy. This essay will discuss why lots of money make people joyful and other things that could make people joyful in life.

Money is the source of some happy life by meeting their basic needs. Been financially stable to provide food, housing, clothing for family provide fulfillment in life. Individuals who could cater for themselves without being in debit or depressed about living expenses are happy. For instance, parents are always delightful when they are able to pay rents, school fees, food and clothes which are the basic needs of their children. Another reason is it provide choice and chance. Having plenty money give you chance to make choices of your own. People are joyful when their preferences are considered, they are given the time to choose for themselves.

On the other hand, they are other things in life which can make people happy. Firstly, good relationship. Spending time with families,close friends, children, partners drivers long lasting happiness to some people. They share quality time like dinner, going to the beach with close relative reduces stress and anxiety. For example, grandparents are always happy when everyone hangout together, they drive happiness from that. Secondly, some people drive joy in helping others. Volunteering and giving to others builds a sense of purpose in life. Knowing that you are able to help someone.

In conclusion, financial stability provides happiness to many people, it could be through meeting their basic needs and provision of choice and chance. Aside money, having a good relationship with people and helping others contributes to some people's happiness in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the question and maintains a clear overall position: money can support happiness, but relationships and helping others matter too. The discussion of money is relevant, especially the examples of meeting children’s basic needs and having greater choice. The second part is also supported with examples of family time and volunteering. However, some ideas are less fully developed than others. The point that money provides “choice and chance” is asserted but not illustrated with a specific choice or explanation of how it improves wellbeing. The final point about helping others ends abruptly, so its link to lasting happiness could be explained more clearly. Develop each main idea with a fuller explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs on money and other sources of happiness, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the other hand,” “Firstly,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the progression, and the examples generally appear beside the ideas they support. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent organisation and shows some of the flexibility associated with stronger cohesion. However, several links are mechanical, and some references are unclear: “they are other things” does not clearly refer to the sources of happiness, while “Knowing that you are able to help someone” is left as a fragment rather than connected to the preceding point. Use clearer links between explanation and example, and ensure each paragraph develops its ideas to a complete conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The response uses a relevant range of vocabulary, including “financially stable,” “basic needs,” “quality time,” “stress and anxiety,” and “sense of purpose.” These expressions help communicate the main ideas, and the reader can generally understand the intended meaning. However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive, which limits precision. “Delightful” and “joyful” are repeatedly used where “happy” or “happiness” would sound more natural; “drive happiness from that” is an awkward expression, and “in debit” appears to mean “in debt.” There are also spelling and form issues such as “rents” where “rent” is intended. Build a more precise set of natural collocations for discussing wellbeing, finances, and relationships.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The essay attempts both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “when” and “which,” and the overall meaning is usually clear. Some sentences are controlled, such as “Knowing that you are able to help someone,” although this is not a complete sentence in context. Other errors occur in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction: “lots of money make people joyful” should use a singular verb, and “Having plenty money give you chance” needs articles and agreement. “Spending time with families… drivers long lasting happiness” also contains errors that make the relationship between the subject and verb unclear. Review subject–verb agreement and article use, and check that every sentence has a complete main clause. More accurate complex sentences would improve control.

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