Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-23
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
In this modern era, money is everything still it can not buy happiness. A few individual believe that money makes them joyful whereas other says their is plethora of things that makes people happy. I partially agree with both of views hold their own significance.
On the one hand, if person have a lot of money they can buy everything they want, such as a high facilities they can use, that middle class family can not. Moreover enjoying that facilities create happiness in their life. Money can not give us satisfaction level that individual needs. For example with the good money individual can go for a best education and have a better career opportunity that makes bright future.
On the other hand, there are numbers of things that makes people happy. First and foremost reason is the family, which is the biggest support system in individuals life, because with them person can enjoy even a little thing that makes them joyful and blessed. For instance, happiness is created by their loved once even a doing small things for them. Secondly, joy is created by good and fit lifestyle. For example, this if person's health is fit enough to enjoy than they will be happy with their life.
Overall, money can buy satisfaction but not happiness. Both ways have their own merits and demerits. It is totally depend on person how they takkle the situation, with happiness or sadness. But still in the life their are so many ways to be happy and joy without money.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other sources of happiness. The position is clear, although the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation of how money leads to a 'bright future' is a good point but lacks depth. The argument regarding non-monetary sources of happiness, such as family and health, is relevant but could be expanded with more specific examples to fully meet the requirements of a higher band. The conclusion is a bit repetitive and does not fully synthesize the points made in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'Moreover', and 'First and foremost' are used to guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'For example this if person's health'. Additionally, there are some issues with referencing, where the connection between sentences is occasionally unclear. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and ensuring that transitions between sentences are smoother.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. There are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'high facilities', 'good money', and 'loved once' (instead of 'loved ones'). While the meaning is generally clear, the student relies on basic vocabulary and struggles to use less common lexical items accurately. To improve, the student should focus on learning collocations and ensuring that words are used in the correct context, rather than relying on simple, repetitive phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('if person have', 'there are numbers of things that makes'), article usage, and pluralization ('a high facilities'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma placement. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable and distract from the overall quality of the writing. A greater focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would significantly improve the score.
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