Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
In the modern era, money has become become prominent part of individuals life and has gains lot of importance in society. Many people believe that being happing in life requires lots of money, while other believe that there are other ways that do not require money and can make people happy in their life. This essay will discuss how money and things apart from money can make people happy.
There are various things that make individuals happy which requires lots of money. Firstly, people can buy their favorite items which makes them happy. Buying items such as house, car, electronic equipment, and many other items they like creates a subtle filling of happiness and buying this items requires lots of money as some of them are very expensive. Moreover, exploring new places and certain activities also make people happy. Vacation, trips and doing fun activities create fun memories that make people happy but it also requires money. For example watching movie in cinema or vacation in Dubai create lots of good memory which make individuals happy.
On the other hand, there are things that do not require money but help family stay happy. Most important aspect of being happy is to stay connected with loved once and spend quality time with them. The good companionship and cooperation of family members has been theimportant thing to stay happy. For example, Events like good dinner time, family time and other events that bring people closer provides peace and happiness, these things do not require lots of money.
To conclude, money is an important things and required in various things such as buying favorite things, exploring new places, which makes people happy. I believe money is not only thing that help people stay happy as spending quality time with loved once is another way of being happy without spending too much money.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the role of money in happiness and alternative sources of fulfillment. The ideas are relevant and clearly structured. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat basic. For instance, the examples provided, such as 'buying items' or 'vacation in Dubai', are clear but could be extended with more depth or analysis to reach a higher band. The position is consistent throughout the essay, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points. To improve, focus on providing more nuanced explanations of why these factors contribute to happiness rather than simply listing them.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central theme. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Moreover', 'On the other hand', and 'To conclude', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and there are instances where the flow could be smoother. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs is functional but could be more sophisticated. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different aspects of the prompt, contributing to the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are some attempts at using a wider range of vocabulary, such as 'prominent part' and 'companionship'. However, there are several errors in word choice and form, such as 'being happing' instead of 'being happy', 'loved once' instead of 'loved ones', and 'theimportant' (a spelling error). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the score. To improve, focus on accurate word forms and collocations, and try to incorporate more precise, less common vocabulary related to the topic of well-being.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'money has become become' (repetition), 'individuals life' (missing possessive apostrophe), 'has gains' (incorrect verb form), and 'buying this items' (incorrect demonstrative pronoun). These errors are noticeable and occur frequently, though they rarely prevent the reader from understanding the intended message. To reach a higher band, the writer should focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and proofreading for minor slips in tense and word form.
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