Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Having a lot of money is the definite method of having a happy life. As most human being are materialistic purchasing new things make them happy. Although, there are others ways of being happy such as making friends and meditation.

Firstly, Money can fulfill many's childhood dreams. As kids there are many hobbies that were not possible to do, either cause of family's financial situation or parents not providing permission to do it. When they grow up and start earning money, they can chose what they want to do without any restriction. When I and my friend were kids we were not able to buy new video game when they lauch, we had to wait for them going on sale or sharing our games. This left us out of playing multiplayer games together as only one of us could play at a time, but now we can both play together because both of us earn enough to get two copies for each of us.

secondly, Most of the population in the world is either middle class or poor and had dreamed of owning everything that they wanted when they were kids. This lead to the feeling that they do not have enough. Furthermore, these people starts to compare themselves to influencers lives on social media, which can me negated going out with friends and maditating. I have a friend who is with me for a long time, fell victim to inferiority complex. However, after that he started to meditate and spending more time with family and friends, he became satisfied with what he has and became happier without owning anything extra.

In conclusion, Having more money is definitively will make people happy but family and friends are also a important part of a person's happyness which does not require any money.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that foster well-being. The ideas are relevant, such as childhood dreams and social comparison, and are supported by personal anecdotes. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The argument that money is the 'definite method' for happiness is a strong position, but the supporting points could be more nuanced. The conclusion is a bit repetitive, and the transition between the two main ideas could be smoother. Overall, the response covers all parts of the task well, though some points are slightly under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as the use of 'Although' at the start of a sentence in the introduction and the awkward transition 'This lead to the feeling'. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words and better referencing to connect ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'materialistic' and 'inferiority complex', which is positive. However, there are several inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'definite method of having a happy life' instead of 'a definite way to achieve happiness' and 'launches' (misspelled as 'lauch'). Spelling errors like 'maditating' and 'happyness' also occur. The range is sufficient for the task, but more precision is needed to reach a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('Most human being are', 'these people starts'), articles, and tense consistency ('had dreamed', 'can me negated'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences starting with lowercase letters or missing commas. While these errors do not significantly impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy would significantly improve the quality of the writing.

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