Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some critics argue that, the main reason for happiness in life is having a lot of money. I think having more money can make people happy in a way that people can buy anything and travel to any place without having a thought of how to arrange money for the same. I believe having a good health and self-satisfaction in life are other things which makes people happy.

To begin with, having more money or wealth makes anyone happy in life because they can buy any expensive product or they can travel to any destination without having a fear of how to arrange money and how much money will be spent for this and that's give them materialistic happiness. To illustrate, if someone wants to go to Dubai for travel and they have enough money so they can go there and have fun while exploring without having thought of money and that makes them happy.

In my opinion there are many other things in life which can make individuals happy. I think having a good physical health and having satisfaction in the work which a person is doing will make people more joyful in life. For instance, if someone is earning less but he is satisfied with his work then he is happy in comparison to someone who is earning more but not satisfied with his work.

To summarize, it is debatable topic and some people states that having a good wealth is a reason for happiness. I think with numerous amount of money people can do whatever they wants to do and that's make them happy. But I strongly think that, having a fit body and self satisfaction are other things in life which can makes citizen happy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that influence it. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive; for instance, the explanation of money allowing travel to Dubai is a narrow example that could have been expanded to discuss broader concepts like financial security or access to opportunities. The conclusion reiterates the main points but does not add significant depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is fully explored with more varied examples or deeper analysis rather than restating the same premise.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. Cohesive devices are present, such as 'To begin with,' 'For instance,' and 'To summarize,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'without having a thought of how to arrange money for the same.' Additionally, the use of referencing is occasionally imprecise, which creates a slightly repetitive flow. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall flow and coherence of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express their ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific language like 'materialistic happiness' and 'self-satisfaction.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there is a reliance on basic phrasing (e.g., 'having a lot of money,' 'make people happy'). Some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'numerous amount of money' (which should be 'a large amount of money') and 'makes citizen happy' (which should be 'makes citizens happy'). Expanding the range of synonyms and collocations would improve the score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'some people states,' 'that's make them happy,' 'other things... which makes people happy') and article usage. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary commas appearing in several places, such as after 'argue that,' and 'In my opinion there are.' These errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic agreement and punctuation would be highly beneficial.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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