Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Happiness is an integral part of life for individuals to maintain their physical and mental wellness. For this, capital is considered as a main source to bring joy in people's lives. Although there is no doubt a better finance status makes people happy but there are other things also matter to stay positive.

To begin with, a better source of income can help persons to manage their economic balance and improves status. To expound, normally wealthy communities can easily complete their dreams with sufficient financial resources which lead them to survive a grateful life. There is one example in India Ambani family they always going around with bundle of joy since they are having a lot of savings in their bank accounts. In addition, people with money can also survival a grateful life since they have affluent status in front of their relatives and friends.

There are other ways which can also help individuals to be delighted like stringer relationships bonding with families and friends and have a healthy lifestyle. To explain it, some people can easily introduce happier moments in their lives while strengthened their bonding with their loves ones they consider its richness to enjoying a long trip, eating out with them or doing adventures things. Moreover, a person with good physical and mental health can be stay happy all times because they can avoid all of diseases with good diet.

In conclusion, Although money is a main source to bring happy moments but a good mindset is

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other factors that influence it. The ideas are relevant, such as financial security and social relationships. However, the development is somewhat superficial. The example of the Ambani family is mentioned but not effectively linked to a broader argument about the psychological impact of wealth. The conclusion is incomplete, which impacts the overall development of the position. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is fully explored with clear, logical explanations and that the essay is brought to a complete, well-rounded conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices like 'To begin with', 'To expound', and 'Moreover'. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'To expound' used to introduce an explanation. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the abrupt ending of the final paragraph disrupts the flow and cohesion of the overall argument. Improving the transition between sentences and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, finished structure would significantly enhance the coherence of the writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of awkward phrasing or incorrect word choices, such as 'survive a grateful life' (likely meant 'live a comfortable life') and 'doing adventures things' (should be 'adventurous'). The use of 'capital' to refer to money is slightly formal but acceptable. To improve, focus on using more natural collocations and precise terminology. Avoid repetitive phrasing and try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to the topic of well-being and financial status.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'better finance status' (should be 'financial status'), 'can also survival' (should be 'can also survive'), and 'can be stay happy' (should be 'can stay happy'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the incomplete final sentence is a significant error. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct word forms (adjective vs. noun), and ensuring that all sentences are complete and grammatically sound.

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