Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Few individuals think that money can buy happiness in life. I strongly agree with this point. I have lots of example regarding this topic. So I explain in briefly.

First point is if I have good money in my account so I can fulfill my desire I even focus on my body eats good food , join gym fully focus on my diet. Secondly, if have a good money, then i explore places in the many countries. Then my life become easier. According to current situation, if you have sufficient money, then people stay more connected with you.

According to others perspective, money will help them buy a lot of subscriptions, like fitness clubs, playing or sports clubs. They think that with money, they can invest in multiple sectors. For instance, people usually invest in buying properties, as well as investing in share markets. If the person have good money then they can use that fund in the charity purpose, so they can make other people happy and fulfil their necessities.

Moreover, money is not the only thing that people can satisfy themselves, on the other hand, we have numerous things in life that can make us or other individuals happy and satisfied, like spending time with family and friends, spiritual connectivity can also boost our mental peace. Volunteer work can also make people calm and focused.

In conclusion, Funds can fulfil our desires and make us or people satisfied and cheerful. Along with that, other activities or things also help people stay relaxed, including spirituality connection, and volunteer work.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and other sources of happiness. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the explanation of how money facilitates travel and social connection is brief and lacks depth. The introduction is also quite weak, as it misinterprets the prompt by stating 'Few individuals think that money can buy happiness,' whereas the prompt implies this is a common belief. While the main points are relevant, they are not fully extended, and the overall position is slightly inconsistent due to the initial misinterpretation of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For instance, the transition 'According to others perspective' is used incorrectly to introduce a new paragraph that actually continues the discussion on money rather than contrasting it. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, such as the use of 'they' in the third paragraph, which lacks a clear antecedent. While there is an attempt at logical progression, the flow between sentences is frequently interrupted by awkward phrasing and repetitive sentence structures.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. The student relies on basic terms like 'good money' and 'things,' which are repetitive and imprecise. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'spiritual connectivity' instead of 'spiritual connection' and 'charity purpose' instead of 'charitable purposes.' While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety and the presence of errors in word formation prevent a higher score. More sophisticated vocabulary related to finance or well-being would improve the quality of the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'if the person have good money'), missing articles (e.g., 'in charity purpose'), and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'I have lots of example regarding this topic'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the reader can understand the intended meaning, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and sentence structure limits the score to the 5.0–5.5 range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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