Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 14 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A few human beings think that money can make people happy, while others might have different opinions. Here, I am going to discuss both points of view in the following paragraph.

First of all, I know money plays a vital role in people's lives because they can purchase whatever they want with money, like living necessities, food, clothes, and travel expenses. For example, in India i have seen many people struggling for food, shelter, and clothes due to a lack of money, whereas rich people do not even care about wasting necessities of daily life like food and water, and somehow they do not reuse their clothes for a second wear so there is an overall gap between poverty and richness.

On the other hand, money can not buy you peace, which you can easily get with your loved ones and family. To explain it furthermore, i can say your family and your health are two important things that can give you a chance to grow again and again but if you miss one of it you do not have these things then your success means nothing to you because you can not share your happiness with anyone, and nobody will be there to cheer for your success. Overall both money and other phases of life have their own advantages and disadvantages for us according to our life circumstances.

to wrap up all, i can say money and other peaceful tasks of life which can make people happy, should be balanced we should not rush for just money or peace; we should make it a habit to balance our life accordingly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: how money contributes to happiness and what other factors are important. However, the development is somewhat limited. While you provide a clear example regarding poverty in India, the explanation of how money brings happiness remains quite basic. Similarly, the discussion on family and health is relevant but lacks depth. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your ideas with more nuanced analysis rather than just stating that these things are important. The position is clear, but the overall development is slightly underdeveloped, which is characteristic of a Band 6 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices such as 'First of all', 'On the other hand', and 'To explain it furthermore'. However, some of these transitions feel a bit mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'To explain it furthermore'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the paragraphing could be more sophisticated. The flow is generally easy to follow, but the lack of variety in linking words and some minor issues with sentence-level cohesion keep this at a Band 6 level.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

Your vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some relevant terms like 'living necessities', 'vital role', and 'life circumstances'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of slightly awkward phrasing, such as 'wasting necessities of daily life' and 'peaceful tasks of life'. There is little evidence of less common or idiomatic vocabulary. To improve, try to incorporate more precise collocations and a wider variety of synonyms to avoid repetition and add sophistication to your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'if you miss one of it you do not have these things' and 'to wrap up all'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some missing capitalizations (e.g., 'i' instead of 'I') and run-on sentences. These errors do not typically impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent capitalization will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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